Chapter Fourteen

Gel Well with Others

In the current scenario, there is a growing importance attached to developing relations. People cannot survive in their jobs if they do not maintain good relations with their co-workers. They should understand the importance of maintaining and developing relations with others, and especially with their co-workers at the workplace. We can avoid several problems and promote goodwill among others if we gel well with others.

Case Study of Robert

Currently, attrition is very high at many workplaces and one of the reasons for this is the fact that employees don’t gel well with others, with their subordinates and/or superiors. Although a salary increment and career growth are the factors for attrition, the inability to gel well with others is another major factor that leads to attrition at the workplace. Sometimes, some seniors in the organization want to dominate over their co-workers. If an employee questions their seniority, he or she may lose the job. Here is the story of a sincere editor in a research organization who lost his job as he was not able to gel with seniors in that organization.

Robert was a generous, humble and noble man. He was new to the organization. He was asked to do a project with a senior, Sarah, who had a dominating nature. Robert completed his part of the project and gave it to Sarah. Sarah ordered him to complete the rest of the work as well. As she was the senior, he obeyed her instructions. Robert completed the entire project and gave it to Sarah. Sarah told Robert there were many mistakes and the project was not supposed to be done in that way. Robert corrected the project as per Sarah’s instructions and presented the project. As Sarah was a senior, she dictated what Robert must do and she asked him to redo the project a number of times. One day, Robert got annoyed and shouted at Sarah for repeatedly harassing him. Sarah got angry with Robert and reported him to the higher authorities, by exaggerating the issue in her favour. Finally, Robert was fired from his job. From this story, it is obvious that it is essential to gel well with others in order to survive at the workplace.

Tips to Gel Well with Others

We cannot choose people at the workplace. People have different natures and they come with different egos, emotions and feelings. Hence, we need to change ourselves as per the situation. Here are some nuggets to help you promote good relations with others at the workplace:

• Radiate warmth and smile. Your smile is a small curve that sets everything right by connecting with others easily. It makes others feel happy and can melt even a stubborn person.
• Be assertive at the workplace. Assertiveness is the art of saying ‘No!’ firmly but politely. It is the middle path between aggressiveness and submissiveness. It is respecting your rights without hurting other’s rights.
• Chat with your friends whenever you find breaks at the workplace as it cements strong bonds with the employees in the organization.
• Attitude counts in relationships. William James said, ‘Whenever you’re in conflict with someone, there is one factor that can make the difference between damaging your relationship and deepening it. That factor is attitude’. Displaying a positive attitude helps avoid conflicts.
• Support others when they are in sorrow. There is a proverb, ‘Shared joy is a double joy; shared sorrow is half a sorrow’. People can develop strong bonds with others if they support the other person at the time of sorrow.
• Make the other person feel important.
• Look at the similarities, not the differences. Wayne Dyer said that problems in relationships occur because each person is concentrating on what is missing in the other person. Every person is unique and everyone has their own tastes and temperaments. We might not like a certain kind of behaviour, but there are always some similarities with the other person which is enough to have good relations.
• Build bridges, not barriers. Don’t fight about petty things.
• Attend parties at the workplace whenever they are organized. It paves the way for better understanding among the people.
• Work as a team. When we work in a team it subtracts the burden on our shoulders and multiplies our success rate. In teams, we share the work proportionately and share more ideas, thus enriching minds and delivering amazing results.
• Be humble, generous and gentle.
• Don’t interfere into other people’s personal space. Learn to draw the line, to maintain long-term relations with others.

Robert Brault said, ‘When something is missing in your life, it usually turns out to be someone’. People often waste a lot of time by quarrelling with others. They lose their precious jobs by not gelling with others. We don’t even enjoy a sense of peace when we fight or argue with people. Having amicable people around you and adjusting with them makes your life much better and happier. Developing bonds with others may help you get a good job and it will take you to higher positions in life. If we gel well, we can live well. This is one of the success sutras you should adopt to lead your life successfully.