CHAPTER 6

Optimal Perception: Rewrite

ONCE WE HAVE acknowledge a sign of stress such as tension or irritability, we practice the first two SBRT steps, Stop and Breathe; then we move on to the important third step, Rewrite. In this step, we reflect upon the situation at hand and assess whether or not we have accurately perceived the situation as threatening. If we have not, we modify our perception. As mentioned earlier, stress involves our interpretation of the event. Often, our perceptions are inaccurate or exaggerated; they do not accord with reality. Our physiology, however, makes no distinction between what is real and what is perceived. What is perceived is real to the body. Thus, perceiving the situation optimally is crucial.

In order to rewrite, we need to understand that a thought is just a thought. Most of us automatically believe what we think. This can have unfortunate consequences when what we think is untrue, negative, or not in our best interest. If you think, “Wow, I am really a loser,” you will immediately have a physiological response to the statement. Because the statement is untrue, the physiological response is a waste of energy. Every thought we have generates a physiological response. When that thought is not in our best interest, it contributes to our physiology spiraling out of control.

Research has shown that when we feel pressure, our thoughts and self-talk (the statements we make to ourselves) tend to become inaccurate. Pressure leads us to interpret ambiguous stimuli negatively. For example, imagine that you have sent an email to your boss outlining a new project you would like to complete. Your boss does not respond all day. This situation is ambiguous, but pressure will likely bias you to interpret the situation negatively: “My boss must not like the idea and is looking for a way to let me down easy.” Complicating the situation, studies show that our brain (whether under pressure or not) is biased toward negativity, responding more strongly to negative stimuli then to positive stimuli. All this negative thinking has two consequences:

1.   The negative focus diverts attention and energy from dealing with the task at hand; it thus reduces efficiency and productivity.

2.   For every negative thought, there is a negative physiological reaction; this reaction culminates in a non-adaptive stress response.

When we are experiencing pressure, we should automatically question our self-statements and beliefs. If we can make an accurate assessment and divide what needs to be addressed from what is just a misperception, then an adaptive response will follow. We can choose our viewpoint and respond in an optimal way to stress.

Thought Distortions and Irrational Beliefs

Before we look at the process of rewriting, it is important to lay out the typical pressure-related inaccuracies that our minds produce. The list below presents several common thought distortions (Burns, 1989). Once we begin to recognize these as misperceptions, we can address them as they arise and replace them with accurate perceptions of the situation. As you read through the list, see if you can remember a time when you yourself engaged in this type of thinking.

•   All-or-nothing thinking—Thinking in black-andwhite terms

•   Overgeneralization—Generalizing from one situation to all situations

•   Mental filter—Picking out and dwelling upon one negative detail of an otherwise good experience

•   Jumping to conclusions—Concluding the worst when the worst is not substantiated by facts

•   Emotional reasoning—Using emotional statements as evidence of the truth

•   Magnification—Exaggerating the significance of a negative event

•   Personalization—Assuming responsibility for a negative event when it is not your responsibility

•   Blame—Blaming others when it is inappropriate

Irrational beliefs may underlie or fuel these distortions, and are often the cause of maladaptive behavior and thinking. Such beliefs are subtle—often “unconscious” —and so can escape our detection even as they drive our behavior. Their irrationality is rooted in the extent to which they are held and under what circumstances. For instance, seeking approval is perfectly appropriate in many situations, but expecting approval in all situations can lead to maladaptive thinking and conflict.

Here is a more specific example: Imagine you have given a presentation and your manager’s response is “I enjoyed your presentation, but your slides could have been more engaging.” The maladaptive, automatic train of thought might be: “I should have constructed the slides differently; therefore, the presentation was bad; therefore, the people who said nice things were only being kind; therefore, they don’t think the presentation was good; therefore, the presentation was terrible; therefore, no one approves of me or my work.” The basis of such a train of thought—the irrational belief that one should be able to obtain approval in all situations—thus results in severe distortion and an overall negative feeling about the situation. Again, such beliefs, despite their powerful effect on us, often escape our conscious notice.

Rewrite: Perceiving the Situation Optimally

Obviously, few of us have time to think about a list of thought distortions and irrational beliefs when we are in a pressure situation; thus, the goal is to become so familiar with these distortions and beliefs that you can recognize them when they occur. It is also important, when in any situation, to tune in to your self-talk and recognize there is always more than one way of viewing things. How do you do this? For each thought, ask yourself at least two questions: What is the evidence for this? and Are these statements in my best interest? At first you may need to write out your thoughts, but later this process will come to you more automatically.

To practice rewriting, follow these four steps:

1.   Notice automatic thoughts. In any situation we need to tune in and listen to what we are saying to ourselves. Instead of talking to yourself on autopilot, notice the words and ideas being expressed.

2.   Identify distortions. See if you recognize any thought distortions or irrational beliefs. Typical words to watch out for are should, must, have to, ought, always, and never.

3.   Challenge thoughts. Ask yourself: What is the evidence for this? Is there another way to view this situation? Is it in my best interest to hold this belief?

4.   Rewrite thoughts. Talk back to yourself with positives and replace the thought distortions and irrational beliefs with more accurate, constructive statements. If you do not have enough evidence to weigh in on an idea, take action and look for the evidence.