CHAPTER 6
Seek out your 12 key people and personalities
So you've started on the path to building a strategic network that works for you. Finding your Core Four — Promoter, Pit Crew, Teacher and Butt-kicker — is the essential first step. But real momentum towards your goals does not kick in until you expand on your Nexus to incorporate the 12 key people and personalities. A quality network of 12 will allow you to build your future strategically, leverage opportunities and mutually exchange value, and accelerates you towards inspirational thinking and exponential growth. START WITH FOUR AND AIM FOR 12 KEY PEOPLE However, who you think is in your network and who you actually have there may be two very different things. For example, you may have included your boss in your network, but their key focus is actually on achieving their objectives, not yours. Do they sit down with you for deep conversations about your career progression and growth? Are they sharing their learnings and inspiring you to do more and take on more? Or are they so busy in their own world that they never have time for you? Do their leadership behaviours and attributes reflect the kind of person you ultimately want to become, or do you roll your eyes at what they are saying and doing? Remember the old cliché ‘what gets measured gets done'. This is what you need to think about when it comes to your network of 12. You need to really dig deep to understand who is really fulfilling what role, and who you are missing. As Jim Rohn once said, ‘Don't join an easy crowd; you won't grow. Go where the expectations and the demands to perform are high.' This is the only way you will keep control and stay in the driving seat of your successful network. You might also like to identify your 12 key people online using the Nexus diagnostic tool at janinegarner.com.au/nexus. The following are your 12 key people and personalities, as shown in figure 6.1: Promoters — help you to become more Pit Crew — help you to be more Teachers — help you to know more Butt-kickers — help you to do more Figure 6.1: the Nexus — your 12 key people Let's look at each in more detail now. Make noise about potential possibilities and inspire you to dream big, to become more. Your Cheerleader is exactly that, your number one fan. They rave about you all the time whether you're in or out of the room. Everyone needs a Cheerleader, pom poms and all. They believe in your dreams, they trust in you and know your capability and capacity, and as a result they jump up and down and make a lot of noise about you. They are your walking billboard, your TV campaign, your social media platform. When we are children, Cheerleaders are everywhere. They sit in playgrounds sorting out the squabbles, they wait for us at the sack-race finish line even if we are coming in last. They gather in cramped school halls to watch us with encouraging smiles as we deliver a lacklustre musical performance on whatever instrument we have yet to master. At the 1992 Barcelona Olympic Games, Derek Redmond tore his hamstring in the 400 metres semifinal. His father jumped from the stands, ran to his side and helped his son limp a full lap of the track to finish the race. Redmond was disqualified for being assisted over the finish line. But that race, that moment, will go down in history as an example of the Olympic spirit. And in that moment Redmond's father was his Cheerleader. Parents are most often our very first Cheerleaders, picking us up when we fall, telling us, ‘You can be whatever you want to be.' But when it comes to networking for success today, it's important to look beyond the obvious, because now you need a reality check just as much as unconditional encouragement. YOUR CHEERLEADER IS THE CEO OF YOUR They want to see you win. They want to see you succeed. Real-life adventurer and author Mikael Strandberg defines an explorer as someone who ‘is almost always driven by curiosity and a great willpower of making a difference'.4 Explorers challenge norms and uncover new paths, so an Explorer in your network will constantly ask you, ‘Why?' They want to know what your goals are and how you're thinking of getting there. They are curious about your path to the top and may give you ideas for a different way of accomplishing your feat. An Explorer isn't interested in what everyone else thinks. They want to know what you think and get excited about the road less travelled and the thoughts less thought. They will force you to remove the lens of normality and replace it with the lens of opportunity. They want you to become more, and they will courageously and fearlessly carve out previously unknown options for you to consider to achieve your ultimate goal. Curiosity may well have killed the cat, but just as a cat has nine lives, in business, in life and in our career we have to be prepared to reincarnate and open new doors and begin new journeys to get to our destination. The world we are living in is moving so quickly that the only way to remain relevant is also to keep moving, to keep being curious, to keep questioning why you are doing what you are doing. This is the role of the Explorer in our network. YOUR EXPLORER WILL QUESTION WHY, WHO, WHAT, They may encourage you to change your outcome and bring to your consciousness possibilities that previously may have seemed impossibly out of reach. Successful entrepreneur Nick Holzherr, CEO of whisk.com, describes his Explorer as: an entrepreneur, investor and friend who has a significant amount of experience across a broad range of industries and businesses. We bounce ideas off each other, explore options, he shares his insight and this enables me to really look at opportunities and challenges from lots of different angles. If there is one thing that doesn't need to be questioned, it is this: highly successful individuals do not become that way by idling along in the humdrum car park of life, waiting for progress and profits to come to them. Inspiration is the power of possibility. When you spend time with someone who inspires you, they light a fire within you, they fuel your dreams and energise you to do more, to take on more and become more. We've all heard the saying ‘Enthusiasm is contagious', and it's true. An Inspirer's energy, passion for what they do, courage and self-belief really are infectious. No matter what you want to do and achieve, having an Inspirer in your network will change everything. They create a picture of a future possibility you can almost see, feel, hear and touch. They inject you with so much enthusiasm and energy that you believe you can take on the world. The Inspirer awakens you to new possibilities. They transform your belief in your own capacities and capabilities. Of course you can. Who is telling you you can't? I know you can. If I can, you can! In a study conducted by psychologist Marina Milyavskaya,5 students were asked to set three goals that they wanted to achieve by the end of the school semester and to report in, three times every month, on their progress. The study found that those who were more inspired in their daily lives set more inspired goals, which were then more likely to be achieved. The researchers concluded, ‘This suggests that goal progress and goal inspiration build on each other to form a cycle of greater goal inspiration and greater goal pursuit.' THIS IS THE ROLE YOUR INSPIRER PLAYS. THEY Keep you on track, nurture you, prevent untoward emotions from getting the better of you, help you to be more. Your Lover's primary focus and concern is you and your wellbeing. However, although it's tempting to nominate a significant other in this role, I strongly recommend you don't. Sure, you'll always have special people there who look after and support you personally, but they don't always need, or want, to listen to everything that's happening in your day-to-day work. This can actually put pressure on our most valued personal relationships. The other danger is that the people who love us the most will generally tell us what we want to hear, not what we need to hear. Your Lover has to be someone who is 100 per cent honest with you all the time — even when it hurts! Their brutal honesty about your behaviour or the decisions you're making can cut you right to the core. This can often be hard to take from a lover in real life. It's not a personal attack; it's the truth you need to hear. Of course, you may still feel that a family member, friend or even lover fits this role, and that's fine, especially if they are working with you on your business. But I still recommend that after initial selection of your 12 key people you seek out someone else to fulfil this role. It's natural for us to put the needs of others — our children, partner or staff, for example — before our own. So our needs get pushed to the back, and we suffer as a result. The Lover in your network doesn't let this happen. YOUR LOVER PUTS YOU AND YOUR NEEDS FIRST TO Singer-songwriter (and ex-cheerleader) Paula Abdul sums up your Lover beautifully: ‘Everyone is your best friend when you are successful. Make sure that the people you surround yourself with are also the people that you are not afraid of failing with.' In his best-selling book The Tipping Point, Malcolm Gladwell describes Connectors as: people who link us up with the world, who bridge Omaha and Sharon, who introduce us to our social circles — these people on whom we rely more heavily than we realize are Connectors, people with a very special gift of bringing people together. YOUR CONNECTOR OPENS DOORS FOR Sure, you may have a network, but you'll be limited by who you know, your experience and how long you've been at it without a Connector on board. Connectors have (you guessed it) connections. They are powerful brokers of information and contacts. They have an innate ability to open doors and make connections between people and information, creating opportunities that might have been unheard of previously — and they love doing it! This is common sense to them. Why wouldn't they introduce you to someone who could help you? There doesn't have to be any reason other than that they see the potential connection so they make the connection. They see first what's in it for you and second, if at all, what's in it for them. Having a Connector in your network gives you a distinct edge. When they understand your goals and needs, your Connector keeps their eyes and ears open for you. They are always thinking about you, your business, your dreams, your personal and professional strategies, and when the right opportunity presents itself the Connector makes the call, sends the email, talks about you — and the brokering happens. Your Connector joins the dots you can't see; they know that connecting you to someone or something will create an opportunity for you to fast-track your dreams. Connectors are brilliant at expanding your network because they can easily pull together information from different networks and make it relevant to you and your goals. Your Connector is absolutely someone you should call on to introduce you to someone you're searching for — such as any of the 12 key people who are missing from your network! Your Balancer keeps everything aligned and in check. They force you to attach your own oxygen mask before you see to anyone else's. THE KEY WORD FOR A BALANCER IS SELF-CARE. They understand your family and friends are precious and important to your overall physical and psychological wellness, and as important as an investment in your wellbeing and your career. They believe that success is about doing what you love to do in the way you want to do it, and that a balanced lifestyle is not just possible, it's an absolute must for any kind of success. We all have a PhD in Juggling. Our lives are a clown-act of ‘too many balls in the air' and the often disastrous consequences of this. All it takes is one bad move for all the balls to come crashing down around you. Your Balancer helps you catch the balls before they fall, often before you even know they are falling. They tell you when ‘enough is enough' and help you stop, reset and re-evaluate. As a mum of three children, I know this feeling all too well. When I first started a business, all my kids were under six. The everyday juggle was intense and the hours long. My sleeping time was in freefall, my diet got worse and my (previously slightly obsessive) exercise routine went out the window. I was starting to run on empty. Then my husband's employer went into receivership and our steady income stopped. Our stress levels went through the roof! We had to downsize, move house and sell assets. If it weren't for my Balancer, Vitality coach and expert Nikki Fogden-Moore, I would have struggled to get back in control. Like Nikki, I believe ultimate success is about getting the balance right. Get this right and you'll become more powerful, both personally and professionally. As Nikki puts it, It's vital to have people within your core team of influencers who truly reflect balance, who create the calm in the storm, who demonstrate a sense of wellbeing both in physical and mental approach. As you build your core team of supporters and those you work with on a close basis, your ‘balancer' is that key person who you know will always bring you back to feeling centred, your sense of purpose and remind you to pause and take time for yourself as well as your vision and mission. This does take work. It does take effort. And like everything you've learned in this book so far, you cannot do it successfully on your own or without being strategic about who you ask for help. Help you develop knowledge, wisdom and foresight, to know more. ‘Been there, done that': say hello to your Influencer. Your Influencer has reached a level of success you aspire to. They enrich your learning experience with their own knowledge. You actively learn from their mistakes, heeding their wisdom and advice. Learning what your Influencer has done well, and what they would do differently if they had their time again, will give you incredible insights and help you avoid having to reinvent the wheel or learn everything the hard way. Success is a complex process, but someone who has been there and done that can explain exactly how it is, what to do and how to navigate the journey — from their learned experience. Your influencer is instrumental in helping build your confidence and supporting the pursuit of your passion. They may also open doors for you through their own strategic and smart network, which can jump-start or catapult your career. At the start of my entrepreneurial journey, I asked a successful female entrepreneur who was 10 years into her journey if I could pick her brains over lunch. I didn't want to take 10 years to learn what she had learned. I wanted to move quickly, to add my thinking to the learnings she shared with me, to achieve my dreams quicker. In the end we met, not just for this one lunch, but regularly over the first 12 months I was in business. There is no doubt in my mind that the learnings and insights she shared enabled me to avoid making some basic mistakes in that first year. YOUR INFLUENCER WILL UP THE ANTE, GIVE YOU Why waste your time and resources reinventing the wheel when you can use others' experience and maximise the return on your investment? Richard Branson once said, ‘The day you stop learning is the day you stop living. We should all pick up new skills, ideas, viewpoints, and ways of working every day.' This is how your Professor plays their part. Your Professor brings fresh ideas, insights and thinking to the table. Maybe they have access to new market data, information and trend reports. Perhaps they're ahead of the curve in terms of what's happening in your industry. In either case, they keep you informed of what's happening now and is likely to happen in the future so your knowledge is always relevant and you are always on top of your game. Many successful leaders credit a teacher or professor who once helped them at school, university or another point in their life. Our learning should not stop when we leave formal education. Learning new skills and gaining a deeper understanding of your field is essential to your professional success; it's a critical part of any job no matter what the industry or level. Today's business environment is growing more and more competitive, unstable, fast-paced and demanding, so we have to keep mastering our skill and knowledge to remain relevant. The consumer can have what they want when they want it, with a constant stream of new products, new apps, new concepts and new information, downloadable, deliverable and easily digestible 24/7. Being the best five minutes ago doesn't guarantee that you will remain so five minutes into the future. YOUR PROFESSOR WILL, AND SHOULD, Learning is not about set-and-forget; rather, it is a continuously evolving process — with a Professor on board. Conversations with your Professor will never involve small talk; they will be intense, sometimes high level and cerebral. There will be moments when you are so thrilled to have nailed something, but your Professor will push you to take it deeper, to unpack it further. Your role is to accept the challenge of the Professor so you keep growing. Your Architect helps design, plan and supervise your next steps. They are expert at visualising the consummation of your plans and how to reach that future. They believe all the hard work is in the planning and pre-production stages, and this is where you need to spend a lot of your time. They are passionate about what you do, are excellent communicators and have fabulous problem-solving skills — all of which are hugely useful to you as you progress through your career or business growth plans. Facing a challenge? No problem, your Architect will work tirelessly and calmly to help you solve it. YOUR ARCHITECT IS METHODICAL, ASTUTE AND They'll set milestones and checkpoints, and help you replan at critical stages of your growth. Just as a movie requires significant investment in the script, approval process and pre-production before moving anywhere near to production, the Architect in your network plays an essential role as the master planner before you move into production. They set specific milestones in the Build of You project, identifying clear checkpoints along the way. They ensure your foundations are solid before you add building block after building block until you get to the Wow, how did I get here? place. Your Architect can help fast-track your success, whether it is writing a book, starting a new venture, negotiating a pay rise, pitching to investors or migrating to another country. Whatever your challenge, they are the Architect of your dreams. Accelerate your journey, push you to do more, hold you accountable for your actions, help you do more. The Truth Sayer is honest and loyal and will force you to commit to your goals with integrity. Your Truth Sayer has well-established beliefs and values that clearly drive their behaviour and decision making. They are candid, transparent, authentic and real. They know that the only judgement that matters is the one you have of yourself. If you don't start leading from within, taking control to acknowledge your values and belief systems and fully owning who you are, you will never be capable of being a better person. As leadership expert John C. Maxwell puts it, ‘If you are bigger on the inside than you are on the outside, then over time you will become bigger on the outside.' Your Truth Sayer is here to kick your butt over your behaviour and the direction you're taking. They will tell you honestly when they agree with you, and be equally honest when they don't agree with you. The Truth Sayer is your go-to, committed to you, your dreams and your goals. They are trustworthy and a great source of strength, encouraging you to be courageous and less fearful. They are a strong motivator for correct action, wanting you to take responsibility for yourself and your actions, to own all of you, to live it and work it because you are unique. YOUR TRUTH SAYER WILL CHALLENGE YOUR Are you really being true to yourself? Did you make that decision because you wanted to make it or because you felt like you had to? Your Truth Sayer will make sure you stand in your own spotlight, shine in your own way, say what you want to say and do what you want to do rather than being dictated to or led by others. The Accelerator makes things happen and accepts no excuses for inaction. Most of us think long and hard about what we want to achieve. We think, and we think … and we think. We think so hard that we eventually think ourselves out of action. If we're not thinking about it, we're discussing it. We discuss the idea, product or concept until we're blue in the face. Put simply, we discuss it until it's dead. This is when your Accelerator kicks in. Whether you have a plan, a dream or a project to deliver on, they will kick your butt into action so your idea doesn't remain just that — an idea. YOUR ACCELERATOR GRABS PROCRASTINATION They make you commit to your goals. They will hold you accountable and will check in on you regularly to see how you're progressing. They know that if they keep on top of you, you will deliver on the goods and achieve your best results. They will test you and convince you that even 80 per cent is ‘perfect'. They will encourage you to face your fears, to get out of your own way and just do it. I catch up with my Accelerator via a 30-minute phone call every Monday. We discuss the week that was, what we achieved and any losses, as well as the week ahead — my key focus, sales targets and where we are at with our key deliverables. This commitment keeps me accountable. We are there for each other to drive momentum and progress. Seth Godin says, ‘Surround yourself with people in at least as much of a hurry, at least as inquisitive, at least as focused as you are.' I say, this is where you will find your Accelerator. You are never too good to need a Mentor. They provide advice and guidance. A Mentor is empowering and enabling, pure and simple. Record producer Quincy Jones credits Ray Charles as his Mentor. The empire that is Oprah Winfrey6 cites the late Maya Angelou as her Mentor. ‘She was there for me always, guiding me through some of the most important years of my life. Mentors are important and I don't think anybody makes it in the world without some form of mentorship,' Oprah once said. Most of the world's most successful and memorable people attribute some of their success to the help of their Mentor. A Mentor will absolutely raise your game. And don't just take my word for it. A survey of 45 CEOs with formal mentoring agreements (HBR, April 2015) found that 71 per cent said they were certain that company performance had improved as a result. In 2014 a survey of 187 businesses7 found that 70 per cent of small businesses that engaged a Mentor survived for five years or more. For those who worked without Mentors, the success rate was half of that. WHETHER IN A FORMAL OR AN INFORMAL Professor Stacy Blake-Beard, of Simmons College in Boston, believes the best mentoring relationships are found where both similarities and differences exist, where individuals ‘share a common ground and learn from alternate perspectives'. An objective Mentor helps you make intelligent and informed decisions. They will warn you of potential pitfalls and provide a level of protection to keep you out of trouble and enable you to grow. In this way a mentoring relationship can give you an edge. It's why mentoring relies on a high degree of trust. Mentors may be older and wiser than you. They may have been there before or have experience in the area you need support in. If you are a recent graduate or in the early stages of your career, a Mentor is critical. Often the reality of work and responsibility, and managing the nuances and politics of a career, is very different from the theory learned in a classroom. A good Mentor will help you identify and focus on your strengths and set goals, and will support you as you navigate the complexities of work. Mary Barra, CEO of General Motors, credits her success to the Mentors she has had throughout her career. As she puts it. When building your network of mentors, be honest about your mid- and long-term career goals, and how hard you are willing to work to achieve them. Then turn to those who best know you and your work. Earn their respect and trust so they will extend their personal capital to you with confidence and be your professional champion.8 John Wooden writes in Success (September 2008), ‘An individual needs to be open to being mentored. It is our responsibility to be willing to allow our lives and our minds to be touched, moulded and strengthened by the people who surround us.' So how was that? What have you discovered? Which of the 12 key people and personalities do you have in your network, and which are you missing? When I work through this process with my clients, they quickly realise that the network they thought they had isn't anything like the network they need to help them achieve any kind of success. But don't worry, you're actually in a great position because you now know who you need in your network. It's by identifying these gaps that you become clear about whom you must seek out. NOW YOU CAN TAKE CONTROL AND Remember, your network does not and should not consist solely of people who think like you. To achieve true diversity you need to balance the 12 key people across industries, experience, genders and geographical locations. That may mean rethinking some people who are in your network and trying to find other individuals to broaden your network. You need one person, and one person only, representing each of the 12 key personality types: one Cheerleader, one Influencer, one Explorer and so on. Only in this way, as Carl Jung's personality typing revealed, can you achieve the right kind of balance. This probably means you will need to find people to fill certain roles, but it may also mean you have to cut back your network (especially if you listed 15 people in your original list in chapter 4 — you're aiming for 12, remember). As noted in the previous chapter, it's likely you'll find individuals who could fill more than one role, in which case you'll need to nominate them for just one and find someone else to fill the other. It's also likely by now that you have identified certain individuals in your network who are actually not supporting you in a way you need. In the next chapter, we'll refine your network further, so you can identify these imposters.
TO FAST-TRACK YOUR SUCCESS.Meet your 12 key people
PROMOTERS
1. Cheerleader
PERSONAL CHEER CLUB, PROMOTING YOU
WHENEVER THEY CAN, SPONSORING YOUR
GROWTH, CREATING OPPORTUNITIES FOR YOU
TO SHINE, PUSHING YOU TO DO MORE BECAUSE
THEY BELIEVE IN YOU.
2. Explorer
WHERE, WHEN AND HOW. THEY'LL DISRUPT YOUR
PRESENT SITUATION TO INTRODUCE YOU TO A
NEW FUTURE.
3. Inspirer
ARE AMBITIOUS, BIG-PICTURE, OUT-OF-THE-
BOX THINKERS WHO NEVER GIVE IN TO ‘I CAN'T'
THINKING BUT INSTEAD BELIEVE YOU CAN
ACCOMPLISH ANYTHING YOU PUT YOUR MIND TO.
PIT CREW
4. Lover
HELP YOU BECOME THE BEST YOU CAN BE IN TIMES
OF HARDSHIP AS WELL AS IN TIMES OF SUCCESS.
5. Connector
YOU, WHETHER TO OTHER PEOPLE OR TO
INFORMATION.
6. Balancer
THEY UNDERSTAND THAT ANY KIND OF SUCCESS
RELIES ON A HEALTHY BALANCE BETWEEN
PERSONAL AND PROFESSIONAL GOALS.
TEACHERS
7. Influencer
FOCUS AND AID IN YOUR DECISION MAKING.
8. Professor
CONSTANTLY PUSH YOU TO THINK BETTER, THINK
DEEPER AND THINK DIFFERENTLY.
9. Architect
FINANCIALLY SAVVY, GOOD AT IDENTIFYING
POTENTIAL GAINS, CHALLENGES AND RISKS, AND
AT LAYING THE STEPPING-STONES TO GUIDE YOU
ALONG YOUR PATH.
BUTT-KICKERS
10. Truth Sayer
INTEGRITY, YOUR HONESTY AND YOUR
TRUTH EVEN IF THIS FLIES IN THE FACE OF
CONVENTIONAL WISDOM AND THE NORM.
11. Accelerator
BY ITS ANKLES AND HURLS IT OUT OF THE
WINDOW. THEY PUSH YOU AND PROD YOU TO
MAKE DECISIONS, TO STICK TO PLANS, TO DO
WHAT YOU SAID YOU WERE GOING TO DO.
12. Mentor
ARRANGEMENT, MENTORS ARE CRUCIAL TO YOUR
GROWTH AND SUCCESS. THEY GUIDE AND INSPIRE
YOUR CAREER CHOICES, PROVIDING WISDOM TO
KEEP YOU ON TRACK AND INSPIRED.
Where are you now?
STRATEGICALLY ALIGN YOURSELF WITH THE RIGHT
PEOPLE WHO WILL FAST-TRACK YOUR GOALS AND
AMBITIONS.Notes