CHAPTER 10

The Law of Balance

Logical Mind Versus Emotional Heart

When dealing with people, remember you are not dealing with creatures of logic, but with creatures of emotion, creatures bristling with prejudice and motivated by pride and vanity.

—DALE CARNEGIE

All companies want to be unique and have that competitive edge. They feel as though they have to create the perfect product, but then it fails. Marketing professors claim that 80 percent of all new products fail. Why is this so? The companies did their research, they did their testing, they talked to the consumer, but the product still failed. Could it be that consumers really don’t know what they want?

One issue is that companies look at the new product offering logically, but consumers purchase with their emotions. A certain manufacturing company found out that people waste electricity every year staring in their fridge with the door open, even though the trend is to be green and save money. So they developed a solution that was green and would save the consumer on the electric bill. They created a see-through transparent fridge. What a great idea! You can decide what you want before you get it, be green, and save money all at the same time. Logically, it made perfect sense, but emotionally it was a train wreck. Our fridges in many ways are like our medicine cabinets: no one’s business. What happens when Aunt Edna comes over, looks in the fridge, and asks it that meatloaf or pudding? The key is to balance the logic with the emotions.

That is the Law of Balance. Logic and emotion must be blended and balanced. Emotions will trigger action, whereas logic will justify the agreement. The proper fusion of emotion and logic will speak to both the conscious and subconscious parts of the mind and increase your ability to persuade.

Emotions create movement and action. They generate energy during the presentation and get prospects to act on the proposal. The challenge with relying exclusively on emotion to persuade your prospect is that, after she has left the persuasive situation, her emotions fade, leaving her with nothing concrete to fall back on. This balance between logic and emotion could be called the twin engines of persuasion and influence.

Power Persuaders know that each audience and individual has a different balance of logic and emotion. Analytical personalities need more logic than emotion. Amiable personalities require more emotion and less logic. Always remember that you need both elements in your message, regardless of their personality types listening. This means you need to shoot the rocket of emotions and always provide the parachute of logic. A Power Persuader will create a proper balance between logic and emotion to create the perfect persuasive situation and message.

We are persuaded by reason, but we are moved by emotion. Several studies conclude that up to 90 percent of the decisions we make are based on emotion, and then we use logic to justify our actions to ourselves and to others.

Note: Emotion will always win over logic, and imagination will always win over reality. Think about talking to children about their fear of the dark or to someone about their snake phobia. You know it is difficult to use logic to persuade them that their thoughts and actions don’t make sense. They remain afraid.

This emotional pattern can also be seen in how we buy and even how we convince ourselves of something. Our heads see the numbers and tell us to stick with the modestly priced car, but our hearts see the expensive sports car. Our heads tell us it’s ridiculous to buy another pair of shoes because we already have 14 pairs. We may even realize that no one is going to notice or care about the new shoes as much as we will. But our hearts win out, thinking of all the stunning new outfits these shoes will go with. We go home with the new shoebox tucked under our arm. Our heads tell us not to believe everything we hear—that politicians are a bunch of liars—but impassioned speeches win our hearts.

LOGIC: WHAT STIRS AN AUDIENCE?

Are we rational human beings? Do we follow logic? Do we only act only if it feels right? Do we even want the facts? Have you ever tried to persuade an emotional person with logic? What about persuading a logical person with emotion? We generally think we make decisions based on facts, but truly this is not the case. It has been found that, when people agree with a message, they tend to perceive it as being logical or rational. On the other hand, when people disagree with the message, they perceive it as an emotional plea.¹ The truth is that our decision-making process relies on a mixture of emotion and its partner, logic. However, we cannot rely entirely on emotion until our logical side has been engaged.

In one study, college students prepared speeches that were written from either a logical or an emotional standpoint. The speeches were presented, recorded, and then evaluated by other college students to find out whether the speeches were perceived as either emotional or logical. The study found that the speeches with which the evaluator agreed were rated as more logical (even if they were intended to be emotional), whereas those the evaluator did not agree with were considered to be more emotional (even if they were intended to be logical). Whether a speech was considered logical or emotional seemed to depend on the listener. Researchers also concluded that, as a general rule, people seem unable to consistently distinguish between logical and emotional appeals.² The logical side of an argument appeals to our reason. Reasoning is the process of drawing a conclusion based on evidence. For an argument to be legitimate, it has to be true and valid, and logical reasoning must be used to back it up.

EVIDENCE AND LOGIC

Concrete evidence should be the cornerstone of a logical presentation. Evidence not only makes an argument ring true in persuasive situations, but it also substantially enhances your credibility. There are four major types of evidence: testimony, statistics, analogies, and examples. You will strengthen your position when you use elements of all four forms, rather than depending on only one. When you provide proof in this manner, you remove doubts that may linger in your audience’s mind.

Testimony

Your audience wants to know what the experts have to say about you or your topic. Testimony is the judgment or opinions of others considered experts in the field or area of interest. A testimony can be a quote, an interview, or an endorsement from a credible person. It can be implied by someone’s presence (attending your event), picture (on your product), or endorsement (on your website).

Statistics

Statistics are numerical proofs of your claims. For example, “This demographic uses …,” or, “four out of five dentists recommend ….” Using graphs and charts makes statistics more memorable and makes a greater impression on the listener.

Some people are suspicious of statistical proof, so make sure your statistics are credible and sound. Your audience needs to know where you got them and who did the research. People know you can arrange statistics to say just about anything. Use statistics sparingly and only in conjunction with other forms of evidence. Besides, a roll of statistics can be very boring.

Analogies

Analogies have a great impact in the mind of the receiver. They enable you to make your points quickly and easily in a way that prospects will understand immediately. (“Installing our new home security system is like having a police officer standing guard on your front porch twenty-four hours a day.”) Analogies allow you to present a new and foreign idea and compare it with something similar that your prospects can relate to in their own lives. Analogies can also give us a new perspective on an old concept.

Examples

Examples can really make your evidence come alive. We love to relate to examples that bridge the gap between logic and our personal lives. Your prospects understand examples at a deeper level because they are based on common experiences and interpretations of meaning. Examples can be real or hypothetical and can include personal accounts, physical evidence, empirical studies, or published reports.

COMPELLING EVIDENCE

As you prepare your message, understand that humans aren’t capable of absorbing all of the information presented. We are bombarded with data all day long, and most of the time we don’t absorb it. In fact, we are very selective in what we allow ourselves to absorb and retain. When we hit information overload, we turn our minds off and retain nothing.

A study on the comprehension of persuasive messages produced very revealing results. After watching commercials and other messages, an amazing 97 percent of viewers misunderstood some part of every message they saw. On average, viewers misunderstood about 30 percent of the overall content they viewed.³ Information is just poured out too fast. The evidence that you choose must be selective, precise, and powerful. You can’t afford to bombard your audience with a data dump.

Spend whatever time you need to fully research the types of evidence you want to use to strengthen your arguments. You already know that using the right evidence from the right sources greatly increases the credibility of your message. However, the opposite is also true; poor or irrelevant evidence undermines the credibility of your message. The more confidence the prospect has in a speaker, the less thinking and processing they will do about the message.⁴ When compiling evidence, consider the following:

  Use evidence supported by an independent expert.

  Statistical evidence is more persuasive when combined with case studies.

  Document the sources of all testimonials.

  Use new information. New facts and research are more convincing.

  Acknowledge the other side. A two-way discussion bears more weight than a one-sided lecture.⁵

Evidence works best when it is suited to the audience and their experience. Consider the following presentation points:

  Referring to evidence as fact increases its weight.

  Evidence that is verifiable is more persuasive.

  Evidence that is specific is more persuasive.

  Unbiased testimony is more persuasive than a biased one.

  Personal experience is more persuasive than no personal experience.

  Presenters with low credibility will benefit from the use of evidence.

  Evidence is especially important when the audience is unfamiliar with the topic.

  Factual evidence is persuasive when the audience consists of highly intelligent people.

  Evidence is more persuasive when you provide the sources and their qualifications.⁶

EMOTION: WINNING PEOPLE’S HEARTS

Whereas logic is the language of the conscious mind, emotion is the language of the subconscious mind. We know that emotions are reactions to perceived and imagined stimuli; they are based on one’s own personal experiences, not on logic. Emotions often outweigh our logic. Imagine a shark tank with a large 12-foot shark. You were told this type of shark does not hurt people and has never attacked anyone. They want you to take a swim with the shark. You know logically you will be OK; hundreds have done this before. They would never ask you to do it unless they were sure it would be safe, but your emotions take over. All of a sudden your emotions and fear outweigh logic. Your what-ifs and your imagination supersede the concrete knowledge of your ability to be safe and swim with the shark.

When you are persuading someone, emotions provide the springboard for a successful execution of your argument. In fact, I would even say emotions are the energy and very fuel of the persuasion process. Without tapping into your audience’s emotions, your message has no strength or energy. Emotion is a power you can harness and use in practically every aspect of persuasion. Logic is important, but emotion helps you catapult an otherwise dull or flat exchange to the next level.

Consider the following advantages of emotion over logic:

  Emotions engage your listeners and distracts them from your intention to influence.

  Emotion requires less mental effort than logic. Logic solicits cognitive effort; emotion is automatic.

  Presentations using emotions are more interesting than logical ones.

  Emotion-based presentations are easier to recall than logic-based arguments.

  Emotion leads more quickly to change than logic does.⁷

You must know when to create positive or negative emotions and when to dispel emotions that disrupt persuasion. You have to find ways to tap into your prospects’ emotions, such as hope, love, pride, gratitude, and excitement. When you can do this, you can influence anyone. Decide ahead of time what emotional climate you want to create, capture those emotions within yourself, and you’ll be surprised how you can transfer those emotions to your audience.

TYPES OF EMOTIONS

Here are some of the major emotions and how they affect persuasion.

Worry

When your prospect is worried or preoccupied with something that is occurring now or that could happen in the future, your ability to persuade declines. Worry is feeling anxious, uneasy, or concerned about something that may happen or that has already happened. Anxiety creates tension—a fear that occupies our thoughts, which if encouraged will grow and continue to dominate our thoughts. I have heard worry referred to as negative goal setting.

You can combat worry in your prospects by easing or modifying their anxiety. Bring them back to reality by having them realize we can’t change many things in the past or forecast the future. Stress that most of the things we worry about are the very things that we cannot change or control and that won’t likely ever happen in the first place. Help your prospects replace their negative mental images with positive ones.

Worry can also be caused by indecision. Get them to make a series of minor decisions, and their worry will decrease.

Fear

Fear is tension caused by danger, apprehension, pain, or destruction. The possibility of harm can be real or imagined. Fear motivates and moves us away from unpleasant circumstances or potential destruction. Fear persuades us to do many things we might not otherwise do. Out of fear we buy life insurance, medicine, home alarms, and guns. Fear causes people to closely evaluate the situation and increases their perception of risk.⁸

Fear does not work in every situation, however; if we were solely motivated by fear, we would never speed or start smoking. The proper dose of fear is essential in persuasion. If the dose is too small, it will not stimulate action. If the fear is too large, it will trigger resistance, and acceptance will decrease.⁹ For fear to stick and to create action and persuasion, it must have the following characteristics:

  The image of fear must be unpleasant, such as the threat of pain, destruction, or grief.

  It must be imminent. Your prospects must feel not only that the fearful event is likely to happen soon but also that it could victimize them. They must feel vulnerable.

  You must provide a solution to the fear. Give your prospects a recommended action to suspend or eliminate the fear.

  Your prospects must believe they are capable of doing what is asked of them. Do they have the tools?

Anger

Anger is a secondary emotion. Prospects’ anger is usually an indicator that something else is troubling them and that they need or want attention. You can assist in diminishing their anger by determining the key issue that they are upset about. It is also often effective to ask for their help, opinions, or advice. This will usually diffuse the anger or even change their attitude and demeanor completely. In some circumstances, you may want to use anger to make a certain point or to evoke a certain reaction. However, angry people are more likely to blame someone else. In their mind, they are not at fault. When they are sad, they will usually blame the situation.¹⁰

When people become angry, they tend to rely on intuition or a quick educated guess. Anger triggers nonanalytical information processing. Anger causes us to use mental shortcuts to decide whether the argument is right.¹¹ An experiment was done that induced anger. The participants who were angry tended to discriminate between weak and strong persuasive arguments more than those in a neutral mood. In other words, those who were angry tended to be more influenced by heuristic cues (intuition) than those in a sad or neutral mood.¹²

MOOD AND HAPPINESS

Moods affect our thinking, our judgment, and our willingness to say yes. When the persons you are trying to persuade are in a good mood, they are more likely to accept your offer. The opposite is also true. If they’re not in a good mood, chances are much higher they won’t bite. A good mood is a huge advantage to you in persuasion. Great persuaders create the right mood. Great persuaders actually put people in a happy state. When we are feeling happy, we tend to think happy thoughts and to retrieve happy ideas and experiences from memory. Conversely, when we are in a negative mood, we tend to think unhappy thoughts and retrieve negative information from memory. The bottom line is that, when we are in a negative mood, we focus more on the person, but when we are in a positive mood, we focus both on the person and the message.¹³ Negative moods usually cause our minds to look for a problem and find something wrong.

There is evidence across the board that mood is a major factor in persuasion. Even simple mood-boosting methods like eating a sweet snack or listening to pleasant music have been shown to make people easier to persuade.¹⁴ An interviewer who is in a good mood tends to assign higher ratings to job applicants.¹⁵ Consumers who are in a good mood will be more aware of positive qualities in products or experiences they encounter.¹⁶ The feeling of happiness interferes with our mental ability to compare and causes us to think less.¹⁷ You are more persuasive when your prospect is in a happy and benevolent mood.¹⁸ Psychology author Harry Overstreet said it: “The best way to get a yes response is to put them in a yes mood.”

Although negative emotions can trigger persuasion, they have to be used with caution because too much of a negative emotion will cause the brain to shut down, impeding your ability to persuade. On the flip side, happiness and being in a good mood actually make the persuasion process easier.

A study was done with participants who watched one out of two television programs. One program was upbeat and happy, and the other program was depressing and sad. The participants were then asked to list their thoughts about the commercials they experienced during the program. As you probably already know, those who watched the happy program had more positive thoughts about the commercials than did those exposed to the sad program.²⁶

TIP THE SCALE

As a Power Persuader, you need to know how to use the dual engine of balance, which allows you to fly straight and true in any persuasive situation. Become a student of both logic and emotion, develop the ability to articulate logic that rings true with your audience, and learn how to use your human emotion radar. It will help you determine important aspects of your audience, such as what your prospects are feeling, which emotions they are trying to hide, which emotions you should trigger, and how you can use each of these emotions in the persuasive process. As a Power Persuader, you know which emotion to use, when to use it, how to trigger specific emotions, and how to balance the audience’s emotion with logic. Engineer your persuasive message with balance.

The Law of Balance will backfire when you use the wrong dose of logic and emotion. This is caused by the lack of research, triggering the wrong emotions, or not being able to adapt to the person or situation. Use the Prepersuasion Checklist (Chapter 15) to discover which emotion to use and what type of logic to implement.

CASE STUDY

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A large corporation had two departments—the marketing department and the IT department—that were not cooperating and were getting insensitive and hostile toward each other. The conflict got to the point that something had to be done to get these departments to cooperate and finish up a major project before the looming deadline. Each department blamed the other for the delays. The CEO asked everyone to put their differences aside and get the project done, but the request did not help. Thinking about the Law of Balance, what is happening here? What would you do?

The issue was that the communication styles between marketing and IT are as different as night and day. Usually IT tends to be more logical, and marketing tends to be more emotional. Everyone was communicating as they liked to be communicated to. Each department thought the other department was wrong because of the different styles of communication and difference in personalities. Teaching each department how to communicate with the other and to understand the different personalities was the key. Helping them understand how coworkers thought and processed information opened their eyes. Their ability to adjust the balance between emotion and logic unified the departments.

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Additional Resources: Psychology of Motivation Audio (maximuminfluence.com)