Preface

AFortune 500 consumer products organization was facing a crisis—5,000 people in their Latin America sales and marketing division were in Critter State (fight, flight, freeze, or faint). With unstable and plunging currencies, unpredictable dictators, and supply chains that disappeared overnight, Latin America was the worst-performing region. Change was a constant, crisis was the result, and no one knew when the next disaster would strike. Executive leadership reached out to us, asking our help to get its 5,000 struggling people into their Smart State (where they could more easily navigate change and reduce stress).

We started with 50 leaders, teaching them our proven and easy neuroscience-based tools in an intensive daylong session. With greater emotional agility, they experienced rapid progress and told their colleagues. Then we worked with the next batch of 50, and so on, until the top 200 leaders and executors were on board. People stopped seeing themselves as victims and started seeing themselves as outcome creators. Their only question was, “What outcome do we want to create today?”

The empowerment spread outward, downward, and upward, across the organization. And two and a half years later, Latin America was the top performer—delivering over 50 percent of the growth annually to the entire corporation. Our client’s executives knew their people had the power within themselves to triumph. They simply needed some new tools.

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A U.S.-based healthcare provider faced a different type of change challenge: the extreme stress that comes with exponential growth. The leaders had nearly doubled the size of their organization from $13 billion to over $20 billion from their acquisition of a key competitor. The finance team had a tremendous task before it: how to integrate both companies, streamline financial operations, reduce redundancies, navigate politics, and sidestep sacred cows, all while honoring the “nice” culture our client was famous for. The finance leaders were overworked, their teams were super stressed, and the work was just beginning.

We started with a yearlong program to boost leadership and deeply empower the finance leaders to “move the decision-making down” that had historically been held closely in the C suite. As the leaders embraced our neuroscience-based tools, they cultivated and elevated their teams, stopped giving orders (and started asking questions), and transformed the change experience from fear and uncertainty into empowerment and ownership. In six months the team was emotionally agile, self-directed, and firing on all cylinders.

•   •   •   

A market-leading food organization was in a bind. A fake news story on social media had spread like wildfire, and revenues of one of their top brands had plunged 27 percent. It was crucial to stop the slide, stabilize, and then start to rebuild.

We were brought in to train a few dozen leaders in optimal teaming, rapidly engaging and enrolling large and diverse groups to come together, focus on outcomes, tell themselves and each other new stories about their situation, and get momentum going. Then we shifted our focus to the marketing team, supporting an initiative to reinvent how the organization marketed to consumers. We started the day with an intense emotion-shifting exercise. Fifteen minutes into it, half the team had shifted from victimhood and disaster thinking to empowerment and possibility thinking. Fifteen more minutes, and the other half were on board. Now it was time to teach them how to bring our tools to their teams.

The result: The brand is safe and growing, and the leaders are stepping into new levels of accountability, meaning, and fulfillment—and they are bringing their teams forward with them. If a disaster ever strikes again, they’ll navigate it gracefully and swiftly.

•   •   •   

These very different companies have three things in common. First, they all have faced the challenges of constant, relentless, and unpredictable change. And they’re only going to see more of that in today’s super-fast, information-overloaded, immediate-response world.

Second, they have the driving need to shift their panicking teams to a more resourceful state in which they are emotionally agile—and to mobilize these teams quickly and efficiently toward a clear outcome. Knowing what you need to do and how to get to where you want is not sufficient. People—including you as the leader—must be trained, equipped, and capable of taking the necessary action to shift their emotional state in order to get there.

Third, when these companies used the SmartTribes tools to become more emotionally agile, they began to succeed at speeds most companies struggle to achieve.¹ Constant, relentless change was now an opportunity to grow, not just “go.”

In other words, all these companies needed to get people on board to create necessary change. It wasn’t a choice. It was a necessity. All needed new tools because the ones that had worked in the past were no longer effective. They needed a new way to power their tribes.

Power Your Tribe is the next evolution and extension of our New York Times–bestselling book SmartTribes.² Though it is worth your time to read SmartTribes at some stage, you don’t need to read it to benefit from this book.

If you have read SmartTribes, Power Your Tribe reinforces the core principles you are familiar with and provides new tools. As the business environment has changed significantly in recent years—making it even clearer that relentless change is now the norm—we at SmartTribes Institute (STI) are continually discovering, pioneering, and implementing new frames of operation and behavior. We do this to support our clients who are faced with—and will continue to be faced with—change.

Where SmartTribes explained how teams become brilliant together, Power Your Tribe shows how teams use emotional agility to stay brilliant together—no matter how turbulent the times and no matter what external changes you face.

WHERE CHANGE OCCURS

Change appears in many forms, including these:

•   External threats, in which people feel victimized by constant change from both external forces and senior leadership’s response to those forces

•   Exciting and often significant external and/or internal opportunities for growth

•   Internal changes in structure, administration, leadership, or policies

Resistance to change is often due to the uncertainty about what it means or what may result from it. And it is important to understand that change occurs on many levels, including environment, behavior, capability, belief, identity, and core, which you’ll learn more about in Chapter 1.

Changes in any of these areas are tremendously threatening to our reptilian brain, which exists to ensure that we survive. Because our reptilian brain thinks change just might kill us, it can subconsciously keep us from making the change we know we need—as you’ll see in Chapter 2.

One of the greatest challenge that come with change is the feeling of isolation, fear, uncertainty, and doubt. When we’re unsure of how to move forward and unclear about what the change means, we often withdraw and isolate ourselves to make sense of what is happening. But we are tribal beings. We need to be together. We need to know we’re safe, we belong, and we matter.

So the key to successful change is understanding and navigating the emotional undercurrent of change together. Where other approaches deal with the surface issues involved in change, in this book we’ll dive deeply into the emotional undertow that often accompanies growth and change so you can learn how to remove emotional resistance to get where you need to be.

This is not to be confused with removing your emotions, ignoring them, or setting them aside. This book is about learning how to use emotions to win. You will learn first how to shift your own emotional state and then how to shift the emotional state of others—and pursue the outcomes you want together. Because while we can’t control external events, we can absolutely control our internal events—how we respond to all that is happening outside of us (and even inside of us).

CHANGE AND GROWTH REQUIRE EMOTIONAL AGILITY

What if I told you that a bird doesn’t need its wings to fly from A to B? Or that it doesn’t need to flap its wings to fly? You’d think I was being preposterous.

Wings for a bird are like emotions for human beings. Life is an emotional experience. Work is an emotional experience. Human beings navigate with their emotions. Emotions are the wings that get us from A to B. Without them, we can’t fly. The greatest highs, lows, triumphs, and fears all come from emotional experience. Emotions are a large part of how we experience the world, each other, and ourselves. And emotional agility is how well we use our wings to fly.

Daniel Goleman’s groundbreaking book Emotional Intelligence changed the way we think about human interaction—and made it OK to acknowledge that humans are emotional beings, even at work.³ The concept of emotional intelligence is crucial for us all to understand because the lack of it causes the majority of human conflicts, including terminations, divorces, and even wars.

But as most of us realize, it’s not enough to simply know that emotional intelligence is important. Whereas emotional intelligence informs us about the quality of our wings, Power Your Tribe will teach you how to use those wings to great effect. In a sense, this book picks up where Emotional Intelligence leaves off—it reveals how to change your behavior at the subconscious level to increase your emotional intelligence.

But how do we shift our emotional state to achieve the outcomes we want, especially when we’re overwhelmed by constant change? We certainly know it’s not as simple as telling ourselves, “OK, let’s look at this in a positive light.” Nor is it useful to tell someone, “Stop feeling overwhelmed. It’s not helping anybody!”

There are steps to changing our emotional state. The first thing we need to know is that it’s not what happens to us that matters. It’s the meaning we attach to what happens that matters. And the meaning we attach is based on what we tell ourselves about what happened. If what we tell ourselves is positive, we’ll have good feelings. If what we tell ourselves is negative, we’ll have bad feelings. If it feels good, we’ll call it a good experience. If it feels bad, we’ll call it a bad experience.

However, the meaning we make about what happens to us often operates well outside our conscious awareness. It not only governs how we behave, it can also limit our capabilities—which is why it’s essential to understand the meaning we are making so we can change it if need be.

According to neuro-linguistic programming (NLP), the human organism will always move toward the best kinesthetic feeling, which is the feeling or emotion we associate with a given experience (that is, the meaning we give it). In neurolinguistic shorthand, it’s known as the “best K.” If there isn’t a best K, it will move toward the least bad K. And since we’ll keep experiencing what we’re experiencing until we’re done with it, it’s important to be present in what is truly happening—and to clarify the meaning, find out what the Ks are, fully appreciate them, cease resisting, and create a vision for what we want next.

Let me give you an example. Suppose you’re a sales director, and a big client—one that accounts for 30 percent of your top-line revenue—stops working with you. Now you need to either replace that client or let go of some staff, maybe delay mission-critical initiatives, and explain the loss to the board. It feels bad, so it is bad. And you, as the sales director, may want to avoid feeling bad at all costs, whether that be via denial, avoidance, freezing up, or resolving to take your anger and frustration out on your team, all of which probably will create an environment of blame instead of collaboration.

However, avoiding bad feelings comes at a cost too. An opportunity cost. A more emotionally agile sales director might still feel bad about losing a big client. It would be strange if she didn’t. But the more emotionally agile sales director will also have another feeling available to her—the feeling of inspiration that comes with the challenge. Thus, that sales director will behave differently. She will consider it an opportunity to speak to the lost client and clarify with specificity why that client left. Rather than using the negative feelings as a sign of failure, she’ll relate to those feelings as feedback and an impetus for growth. She might redirect her attention to incorporating the feedback from the lost client and mobilize the team to plug the holes in the company’s main service offering so that the rest of the client base won’t suffer the same consequences.

This agile maneuver can result in increased penetration per client and increased top-line revenue per client account. The difference that made the difference? The meaning that the sales director made and the feelings that were available to her as a result.

If we want to inspire a new behavior in people to achieve better results, then we need to create a better K around what we want those people (or ourselves) to do versus the pattern they (or we) keep repeating, which currently has the best K (or least bad K). As leaders, it’s our job to add more options to the menu of possible behaviors—both for others and for ourselves. This is one of the key tools you’ll be learning in this book.

Experience can be changed. We do this by changing what we tell ourselves about our experiences (the meaning we make), which changes how we feel and changes how we classify the experience. And yes, at times, we will help others change what they tell themselves. Because another job of leaders is to help expand the identities of their people: to help them see how much choice and power they truly have.

Emotional agility is, in essence, about choosing how you want to feel, and helping others choose how they feel too. If emotions are the muscle, then emotional agility is the flexibility, strength, and adaptability of the muscle. With the right tools and the right training, this form of agility can be built into the muscle memory of your organization. And the more emotionally agile your organization becomes, the less it will need to “think” about becoming more agile. What would that mean for your organization?

YOUR PLAYBOOK FOR CHANGE

Power Your Tribe is based on the STI methodology we have created over the last 30-plus years of helping leaders get the results they want in organizations ranging from startups through Fortune 10 multinationals. Our blend of mapping diverse neuroscience research to practical tools and techniques has generated the many results our clients rave about.

In this book, you’re going to learn how to build emotional agility through a process called the Resilience Cycle, which follows the change progression we see most commonly (Figure P.1).

We generally start out either resisting change or feeling annoyed and/or frustrated by it. Here most of us stay stuck, refusing to see change for what it is—an opportunity to acknowledge that what worked before doesn’t any longer or that the conditions in our life are now new.

Once we are able to move through resistance, we can stay present to what’s happening by increasing rapport with ourselves. As a result, we can create new meaning, expand our identity, and ultimately have more choices. Then, with new choices open to us, we can anchor the outcome we want, enroll and engage our tribe in pursuing that outcome, and keep everyone agile and powerful as new changes arise.

Note: You may pop into the process at any point in the cycle. For example, if you’re not resisting anything but need to make new meaning, start there.

Figure P.1 The Resilience Cycle

And because just understanding the process isn’t enough, to help you and your team move through each stage in the Resilience Cycle, you’ll also receive a set of super powerful and effective tools that are easy to learn and use. Together, the process and tools make up your change playbook. Your playbook will help you implement changes in your organization, whether those changes are simple or complex, local or global, or narrow or broad.

EMOTIONAL AGILITY + TOOLS = POWER

In Part I, “What Happens Inside When Change Happens Outside,” you’ll learn some foundational principles of how we experience the world—how we decide whether what is happening is “good” or “bad,” how stimulus from outside events causes us to assign meaning to our experience, and how your emotions even affect your cells.

Essentially, a business is made of people: employees, key stakeholders, and its owners. Adjusting the way people in a business behave and perform adjusts the way the business behaves and performs in the market. Therefore, if we want to change our business performance in change scenarios, we must first understand how people perform in change scenarios so that we will know what needs to be adjusted (if necessary) to align with the business’s performance objectives.

Based on this foundation, in Part II, “The Power Your Tribe Playbook,” you’ll build emotional agility in yourself and those you lead in the change situations you face right now. You’ll learn the tools and the processes to release resistance, be fully present, make new meaning, anchor the outcome you want, and enroll and engage others in achieving that outcome—all the while building a resilient tribe that has predictable revenue, passionate teams, and profitable growth. You’ll also learn how to raise the bar and help your team redefine their personal best.

Finally, in Part III, “The Power Your Tribe Playbook Case Studies,” we will walk you through some client case studies that show you how to apply a specific mix of tools in a variety of contexts, such as leadership abusing power, competitive crushes, merger and acquisition stresses, and family business and board dysfunction.

At the end of the book you’ll find the appendix, which includes a diagnostic chart (Table A.1) that you can use in any scenario that summarizes all the tools you now have in your toolbox so you will know when to use them and how.

This book is designed in a problem-promise-result format, so it’s easy to see how our tools will help you accomplish your goals.

Change is the new constant. Use it to power your tribe.