Overview

Participants are encouraged to think about the ethical ramifications of verbally abusive behavior or situations in the work environment.

Purpose

To make participants aware of how verbally abusive behaviors affect job performance, organizational perspectives, and interpersonal relationships.

Group Size

The ideal group size is 18 to 20 participants.

Room Arrangement

Select a room large enough for a subgroup to break out. Set up the main work area in a “U” shape, allowing room for the facilitator to enter the “U” and be in the middle of the discussions.

Materials

Projector for transparencies or for PowerPoint slides

Transparencies 11.1 through 11.7 showing questions

Tape for hanging the flipchart sheets on the wall

Magic markers

Post-it® notes (3 × 3-inch size), in bright colors if possible. You will need one pad of notes for each table.

Flipchart with the activity headings written at the top of each page. (As the pages are completed, they should be hung on the wall for viewing.) Use a Post-it® note or piece of paper to conceal the heading “Your Home Life” on the third flipchart page.

Headings and setup for flipchart sheets:

Procedure

1.Spend the first 5 minutes establishing ground rules with participants. These rules encourage a more open environment, permitting individuals to share their thoughts without feeling they are overstepping bounds. The rules might deal with confidentiality, for example: “What is shared in the room stays in the room” and “No names—company or people.” After you go over the ground rules, tape this sheet on the wall. The second flipchart page is not visible at this time.

2.Show and read the question on transparency 1, “How many of you have witnessed verbally abusive situations in your workplace?” Ask participants to pair up to share their experiences with one another for 5 to 10 minutes.

3.Next, facilitate a discussion for approximately 10 minutes by inviting the group as a whole to share experiences. Show and read the question on the second transparency, “How many of you have personally experienced verbal abuse?” to stimulate the discussion. Note: Be prepared for emotions to surface during this part of the exercise. Intercede if you observe any participant becoming emotional; say something like: “Before you finish, let me share with you an experience of my own” to allow the participant to compose him- or herself. Of course, you could also ask, “Would you prefer to tell us the rest of this terrible story later?”

4.Proceed to the next question on transparency 3, “How did this make you feel?” Refer to the flipchart sheet with the same heading at the top. This part of the exercise calls for participants to answer the question individually and silently. Instruct them to write their feelings on the Post-it® notes (one comment per sheet). Invite participants to share what they’ve written and then to hang the Post-it® notes on the flipchart sheet. Facilitate any discussion that takes place at this time. When the discussion is complete, take the flipchart sheet and tape it to the wall.

5.Show the next transparency, 4, and ask the question, “How did this affect your work?” The flipchart page will be set up as a “T” chart with “Your Home Life” covered up at this time. In this part of the exercise participants work alone. Instruct them to write their comments on the Post-it® notes (one per sheet). After a few minutes, invite the participants to share what they’ve written and then to hang the Post-it® notes on the flipchart sheet. Facilitate any discussion that takes place at this time.

6.Show transparency 5 and ask the question, “How did this affect your home life?” Uncover the right side of the “T” chart on the flipchart titled “Your Home Life.” This portion of the exercise, once again, is completed individually. Instruct the participants to write their comments on the Post-it® notes (one per sheet). Encourage discussion among participants of what they’ve written and then invite them to hang the Post-it® notes on the flipchart sheet. When this discussion is complete, tape the flipchart page to the wall.

7.Place transparency 6 on the overhead and ask the question, “When this behavior is allowed to continue, what does this communicate to those working in the organization?” Ask participants to pair up and share with one another what they feel is communicated and why. Instruct them next to write their comments on the Post-it® notes (one per sheet). Facilitate any discussion that arises at this time. Ask participants to place their Post-it® notes on the flipchart page. When the discussion is complete, tape the flipchart page to the wall.

8.Continue with the question on transparency 7, “When this behavior is allowed to continue, how does it affect how we view our organization?” Ask participants to form pairs and share with one another specifically how such behavior and the fact that it’s allowed to occur affect their view of the organization. Instruct them to write their comments on the Post-it® notes (one per sheet). Invite participants to share their thoughts and then to hang the Post-it® notes on the flipchart sheet. Facilitate any discussion that takes place at this time. When the discussion winds down, place this flipchart sheet onto the wall.

9.Conclude by asking the participants, “What have you learned through this exercise?” Facilitate the discussion and bring in key points of interest from the flipchart sheets hanging on the wall. Then ask the question, on the final flipchart page, “With what we have learned today about how abusive behaviors affect us at work and at home, what are we going to do to ensure that we are not contributing to this behavior?” Facilitate an open discussion and write comments on a flipchart sheet.

Discussion

Does your organization have a policy regarding violence in the workplace? If so, what does it say about verbally abusive behavior?

If not, what should it say about such behavior?

Quotations

“Be the change you want to see in others.”

—Mahatma Gandhi

“Everything I do and say with anyone makes a difference.”

—Gita Bellin

“Everyone and everything around you is your teacher.”

—Ken Keyes, Jr.

Points of Interest

It doesn’t take much imagination to realize that verbally abusive behavior can easily move from a verbal altercation to physical blows. The statistics concerning violence in the workplace are truly alarming.

The Federal Bureau of Labor Statistics Report from August 2001 notes the total fatalities within the workplace is 5,915. Homicides attributable to shooting account for 9 percent of that number and all other causes of homicide total an additional 2 percent. (See www.bls.gov.)

Furthermore, the National Safe Workplace Institute (NSWPI) reports that nearly 25 percent of all employees report having been threatened, harassed, or actually attacked on the job in recent years.

Two million employees report physical attacks. The cost of these attacks, in lost work and legal expenses alone, is nearing $40 billion. The actual cost may be higher: 55 percent of victims indicate they failed to report incidents to the police department.

ILLUMINATE OF ROCHESTER, INC., is a coaching, consulting, training, and team development organization whose focus is to assist individuals and organizations in transition through issues of change, layoffs, mergers, abusive management and co-worker behavior, and fear in the workplace. Co-CEOs Eve Strella and Gwen Martone have merged their expertise as an industrial engineer and a clinical therapist with a combined 32 years of hands-on experience in the area of human solutions.

TRANSPARENCY 11.1

TRANSPARENCY 11.2

TRANSPARENCY 11.3

TRANSPARENCY 11.4

TRANSPARENCY 11.5

TRANSPARENCY 11.6

TRANSPARENCY 11.7