Some Takeaways

BIPOC women experience the compounding effect of intersectionality. These gaps get even worse when a woman of color is also a mother, has a disability, or is transgender. Women with disabilities earn $0.72 for every $1 a man with a disability earns and people with disabilities earn only $0.68 for every $1 a nondisabled person earns.¹ Transgender women's earnings fall by nearly one-third after they transition.²

Men also experience wage gaps. Black men and Latinos earn $0.87 and $0.91, respectively, for every $1 a white man earns.³ The pay gap is $0.95 for gay men and $0.77–$0.88 for bisexual men.⁴

Pass Policy for Equal Pay

It's been illegal to pay men and women differently for performing the same work since the passing of the Equal Pay Act of 1963. But it can be challenging to prove the work is equal. According to Margaret Scheele and Setareh Ebrahimian, attorneys at Fisher Phillips, a management-side law firm, who focus on pay equity, the real protections are at the state level. Many state laws have a more lenient requirement for defining who can serve as a comparator, such as equal pay for substantially similar or comparable work. Every state with the exception of Mississippi and North Carolina has some sort of equal pay legislation and new laws continue to help close the gap. For example, California now (as of January 1, 2021) has a pay reporting requirement where private employers with one or more employees in California, and 100 employees overall, must submit a pay data report to the state each year.

Perform Company Pay Audits

A pay equity audit means looking at current compensation and roles across gender and race/ethnicity to see that pay is fair – meaning, employees are receiving equal pay for substantially equal work. Setareh shared that she's definitely seen a trend of more companies conducting pay equity audits and it's not just to stay out of legal trouble. “A lot of companies want to know if there are pay disparities internally and how to address them because they are interested in attracting more employees, attracting better employees, reducing their turnover rate, and generally want to do the right thing.”

Revamp Internal Hiring and Promotion Processes

There is often gender and racial bias built into internal company practices – from who gets promoted to staffing decisions and how annual reviews are conducted. Women often receive less feedback, get fewer high-profile assignments, have less access to mentors and sponsors, and are less likely to be hired. In a study on government jobs with 16 million participants, qualified Black women were 58% less likely to be hired than white men, and overall, qualified women were 27% less likely to be hired than qualified men.⁶ An applicant named Jennifer is assumed to be much less competent than an applicant named John, even with the exact same qualifications. Studies show that even if Jennifer did get the job, she'd be paid less and would also be less likely to be mentored.⁷

Address the Unpaid Labor of Women

In the United States, women perform 4 hours of unpaid labor per day compared with men's 2.5 hours. That's almost 11 extra hours per week, 45 hours per month, and almost 550 hours per year. What would you give for an extra 11 hours per week? Economists have acknowledged that gross domestic product (GDP), the most common method to track an economy's health, has been leaving out the unpaid work of women for 80 years. By Chapter 4 of this book, are you surprised? Many of the policies mentioned earlier, like raising the minimum wage, paid leave, and affordable childcare, will help. On the individual level we can work to create equality in our homes, which will not only improve our own lives but, for those with children, will model a more equitable division of labor for them.

Reframe the Negotiation

First and foremost, what is a negotiation? It's just asking for what you want. You might not realize it but you're negotiating all day, every day. When you and a friend decide which restaurant to go to, that's a negotiation. When you later decide which app to share, that's a negotiation, too. We can use these everyday low-stakes negotiations as an opportunity to practice asking for what we want.

You might have noticed that it's so much easier to negotiate and vouch for your friends than for yourself. This is something we can work to unlearn but even after working on this for years, I still feel it. What's helped me is to realize that I am negotiating on behalf of women everywhere. When you negotiate your compensation you are paving the way for other women to do the same, you are normalizing negotiating, you are gaining experience you can share with others, and you are doing your part to close the pay gap. That's powerful.

Understand the Double Bind

Women who negotiate (and studies show women are actually negotiating as much as men) can be viewed as unlikeable and are more likely than men to receive feedback that they are “intimidating,” “too aggressive,” or “bossy.” This is the double bind. For women of color, this translates into the angry Black woman and fiery Latina stereotypes. Women are told to negotiate, but when we do, there are negative long-term career implications.

As a way to overcome the double bind, experts recommend that women negotiate communally, using words like “we” and “us” and framing your “ask” in a way that shows it's better for the team and company as a whole. Yes, I'm annoyed even writing this, but this is the world in which we're negotiating.

As a way to give companies the benefit of the doubt and hold them accountable, Claire Wasserman, the founder and author of Ladies Get Paid, is a big fan of saying, “I know you're a company that pays people fairly. I know you're a company that values gender and racial equity, so I'm sure we can come to a conclusion that works for everyone.” And know that you're making the company better by asking them to pay you fairly. If you're interviewing at a new company, you can say this without knowing it's true (because how can you know?), but if you work there, you'll want to tailor the statement to be reflective of the reality at the company.

Know Your Market Rate

Let's be clear – your market rate is not the same as your worth. I think this idea that what we earn is what we're worth is one of the reasons talking about what we earn feels so uncomfortable. Our market rate is just the going rate for the type of work we do. That's it. And it typically comes in the form of a pay range (also called a pay band).

How do you find your market rate? Start by talking to friends and colleagues (especially white men) about what they earn. You can acknowledge the awkwardness and share how important pay transparency is for equal pay. Remember, you are giving them an opportunity to be an ally. You can also talk with people who used to work in your role. This can feel a bit less daunting, as they aren't sharing their current salary information.

Side note on pay transparency. Keeping salaries a secret hides pay inequities and discrimination. When we know what others are earning, we know whether we're being underpaid. It can feel difficult to talk about what we earn, but it's worth it. Share what you earn with coworkers and friends. Enter your salary info into databases like the Career Contessa Salary Project, Salary.com, Glassdoor, and PayScale so that the information is more readily available. Know that it is completely legal for you to share your pay with your coworkers and that it's illegal for your company to penalize you for it. That being said, it's important to acknowledge that it can be hard to prove if your company did penalize you for it. Pay transparency is a small part of a broader systemic solution, but information is a powerful starting point.

“Fun” fact: In 19 states it's illegal for an interviewer or future employer to ask about your salary history (including what you are currently earning). The reason? If most women are already being underpaid, this perpetuates wage gaps.

For more salary info, call up recruiters in your industry (they have all the insider pay info!) and do some online research. The more specific you can get about your role, location (it matters!), and level of seniority, the more accurate the range will be.

Know Your Walkaway Rate

The last thing you want to do is take a new job or stay in a job where you're being underpaid, only to resent the role and feel angry. Go into the negotiation with optimistic expectations but also know what you are not willing to accept.

Take time to think this through. Know the facts and compensation range the role warrants and also know yourself and your specific experience. Imagine yourself working in the job a month or six months down the line. What compensation will have you continue to feel valued in the role?

There is a lot of nuance to this. If you are pivoting careers, you might be excited to switch roles and know that you will accept lower pay as you gain experience in a new industry. Just know that women generally tend to undervalue their experience and expertise, which might apply more to the new role than you think.

Prep Your Case

One of the most important things to bring into a salary negotiation is a list of your successes and accomplishments. You want to be able to share the value you've brought to the company (or previous companies) and, in some cases, show how you've already stepped into the position you want to be promoted to.

When you have a big success at work, you might think you'll never forget it, but over time, it's hard to recall all of the things you've done. You might even draw a blank: “What have I even been spending my time doing these last few months?” Keep a running log of your successes, big and small, so you can pinpoint projects where you've had an impact. When possible, use measurable data like a percentage increase in revenue, a decrease in expenses, how many participants were involved, and the project's timeline. You can also add these successes to your LinkedIn profile, CV, or resume.

Lauren Smith Brody, gender equity advocate and author of The Fifth Trimester, talked about the very valuable yet overlooked work that women take on more often than men, like informally mentoring a colleague, leading an employee resource group (ERG), or helping to train someone. Don't forget to include any additional unpaid work you do. Make it part of your routine to add a win or two to your list of successes each week.

Not only will this serve as a great resource, it's also a nice confidence boost!

You can download a digital version from the Financial Adulting toolkit.

Toot Your Own Horn

You know that amazing success log you started? It's time to share it with people (specifically, your colleagues).

If you aren't used to sharing your successes, it can feel uncomfortable at first, but I promise it gets easier – and over time your boss will come to expect it. Pop into their office this week (in person or on Zoom) and share a success. You can update them on a project that's going well or share an exciting result you and your team achieved. Then build the habit of doing it at least once per month or quarterly, depending on the relationship.

Side note on imposter syndrome: Imposter syndrome is feeling like you do not deserve your success and accomplishments because they are due to luck and you'll be discovered as a fraud. Sound familiar? Women experience imposter syndrome more than men and this is intensified for women of color. According to clinical psychologist Emily Hu, “We're more likely to experience imposter syndrome if we don't see many examples of people who look like us or share our background who are clearly succeeding in our field.”⁸ You can imagine the implications this has on what women earn. It's helpful to understand that this is very common and might be impacting your confidence in a negotiation or even taking on a more high-profile project.

The term imposter syndrome has become more and more controversial because it “directs our view toward fixing women at work instead of fixing the places where women work,” says Ruchika Tulshyan and Jodi-Ann Burey in a piece for the Harvard Business Review (HBR).⁹ They go on to encourage companies and managers to create a culture that addresses systemic bias and racism so women, and especially women from underrepresented communities, experience imposter syndrome less and less.

Negotiate; Don't Stop with No

If you want a promotion, your manager should know about it. You can even ask specifically what it would take to make it happen. If during your research you found out you are being paid less than your male colleagues or below market rate, bring that up. Given all the publicity and work being done around equ al pay, it can work really well to call the issue out directly. “In my research it has come to my attention that I'm being paid less than my peers for my role (or even my male peers).”

Lauren encourages everyone, before going into even the simplest negotiation, to understand that closing the wage gap and promoting and retaining women is the best thing for everyone, including the economy. A recent study showed that if there were equal representation in the workforce, the U.S. GDP would go up by 5%. Read an article like that right before any negotiation and you'll go in thinking, “Yes, we deserve this!” Now that's a pump-up.

Claire encourages us to push ourselves outside of our comfort zone but not so much that we've twisted ourselves into a pretzel to become someone else. “You still have to be you.”

When I hear the word “no” in a negotiation I can feel very shut down. But the word “no” is actually a sign to continue the conversation. If your boss can't give you a raise at this time, try to understand why. By getting curious rather than shutting down, you might find helpful pieces of information that you can use to support your manager in making your case.

It's a Year-Round Process

We often think of these salary conversations as a once-a-year or once-per-promotion cycle occurrence. The pressure is on, and they can feel really formal and nerve-wracking. But the truth is, we want to be having these conversations throughout the year.

Claire recommends trying to have these types of conversations on a quarterly basis. “It doesn't mean you're necessarily having a conversation about getting a raise. Maybe you check in to see how you're doing, to ask if you're on track for your promotion, or even more broadly talk about how the company is doing or what growth and up-leveling could look like for you.” This is also a great way to find out about any leadership development, mentoring, or shadowing programs that the company may offer or reimburse.

Other Important $$$ Things You Can Negotiate

Our base salaries are really important because future raises, bonuses, and 401(k) matching are usually calculated as a percentage of them. That being said, there are many other parts of our total compensation that we can negotiate and should factor in when comparing opportunities.

Georgia Lee Hussey, CFP and the founder and CEO of Modernist Financial, encourages us to “look at and really understand the whole package, including benefits, especially when you're negotiating. There's so much money in there that is often ignored.” And you can negotiate for whatever is most beneficial to your personal goals.

• Relocation budget (reimbursed expenses for a move to a new place)
• Paid leave (this should always be a benefit but it's not always the case)
• Vesting (how quickly stock compensation or 401(k) matching become yours)
• Flexibility (control over your schedule or ability to work around other priorities in your life)
• Bonus structure/commission (compensation tied to performance)
• Professional development expenses (this could look like a training or coaching program or part-time MBA)
• Equity (common in startups – ownership of the company in the form of options, restricted stock units, or performance shares)