Choice 10
Mental Reframing

In my previous book, The Power of Failure, I wrote about many themes that challenge typical modes of thinking:96

The book addresses a variety of ways that life setbacks can be turned into opportunities for success. Many of the strategies I describe involve rethinking difficult circumstances. Examples are wide ranging. They include the classic story about how a failed attempt to create a new kind of glue resulted in the invention of Post-it notes at 3M, investment strategies that purposely target as buying opportunities securities in markets that are dropping sharply, and Bill Gates’s view that many of Microsoft’s most successful products resulted from previous product failures.

In fact, many of the greatest achievements in the history of the world resulted from repeated failures that were treated as opportunities to learn and stepping-stones to success. The invention of the airplane that enabled humans to fly, revolutionary drugs that cured deadly illnesses, and the invention of the light bulb that brought light into the darkness are just a few of these seeming miracles (at the time) achieved in the wake of repeated failures.97

In the latter example, Thomas Edison made hundreds of unsuccessful attempts before finally inventing a light bulb that worked. At one point in this long and challenging process, he was asked how he could continue this pursuit after failing more than a thousand times. He reportedly replied that he had not failed. Rather, he had succeeded in discovering a thousand ways that didn’t work. This powerful reframing of events helped establish the motivation to go on. It fostered a mental attitude needed for turning what could have been feelings of hopelessness into a sense of progress and hopefulness.

Bill Gates has offered powerful advice for applying this kind of thinking to a practical everyday business example— how to address unhappy customers.⁴³ He suggests that customer complaints should be integrated into the development of products and services. Somewhat surprisingly, he prescribes a focus on the most unhappy customers of all. Instead of avoiding these, perhaps rather extreme, critics of what the organization has to offer, he points out that they offer a rich source of information and a great opportunity.

By finding out about their unhappy experiences and what they would like, useful insights can be obtained. This knowledge can then be passed on to employees who are in the best position to use it in developing and improving products and services. Gates points out that this approach allows discouraging bad news to be turned into an exhilarating improvement process. As a result, the most difficult customers, who seem to represent the biggest obstacles, become the greatest opportunity for future success.98

This example illustrates in a practical way the idea of mental reframing. Almost any situation, no matter how seemingly bleak or negative, can be reframed in a more constructive and positive way. A significant mistake is an opportunity to learn what not to do in the future, and perhaps provides insight about a new and better approach. A lost job offers an opportunity for a new exciting career. An argument provides a chance to learn something about relationships and how people differ in the way they see things. A stressful event is an occasion to become stronger and more confident about being able to withstand challenges. And so on.

The important lesson is that every challenge in life can be viewed from different angles. Even the most difficult situations almost always offer some advantage or opportunity. The key is to use flexible thinking with a good dose of optimism. With practice, a choice to use mental reframing can become an important emotional discipline tool for enhancing the way you feel about and experience life.