SKILL FOUR: PERCEPTION CHECKING
a. Perception checking is where you ask the person for verification of your understanding of what has been said over the past several statements.
b. Perception checking asks for feedback about the accuracy of your listening.
c. Checks that an understanding is taking place with the other person.
2. IDENTIFY PURPOSES FOR USING THE SKILL
a. To allow you to test your understanding of what has been said.
b. To provide an excellent method of giving and receiving feedback on the accuracy of the communication.
3. ENHANCE UNDERSTANDING OF PERCEPTION CHECKING
As previously noted, when people are in acute grief, frequently miscommunication occurs. Perception checking is a skill every funeral director should work to develop. Having the ability to ask supportively for feedback about your understanding of what is said will dramatically increase your overall interpersonal skills.
When you are in the position of helping others you should emphasize the importance of having clear and concise communication. The person you are assisting will appreciate your efforts to be certain that you are both understanding each other. Again, perception checking is an invaluable tool to use when working with people in grief.
4. ILLUSTRATE THE USE OF PERCEPTION CHECKING
“You expressed some doubt about using that particular minister. Did I hear you correctly?”
(Asking “Did I hear you correctly?” allows the person you are helping to clarify any confusion in your understanding.)
‘I want to check with you about what I think I heard you say.You said you would like to have several family members participate in the service, but you don’t want the service to be long?”
(Stating “I want to check with you about what I think I heard you say” helps the person realize that you want to check on your understanding.)
“While you would like to have music for the service, you are unsure you want organ music. Is that right?”
(Asking “Is that right?” allows the person you are helping to clear up any confusion in your understanding.)
a. The person who you are helping experiences a feeling of being understood.
b. Perception checking is an excellent method of quickly clearing up any confusing communications.
c. It helps correct misperceptions before they become misunderstandings.
Trainer will do any additional role-play modeling to enhance the ease of learning for participants.
GROUP REHEARSAL WITH TRAINER PERCEPTION CHECKING
Directions
The trainer will talk to the group about any topic. The task is for everyone to listen and when a natural break occurs anyone can offer a perception-checking statement.
Expectations
This will allow everyone to practice in the group setting in a non-threatening environment. The trainer will provide immediate feedback on the perception check and make any suggestions for improvement. This activity also allows participants to observe that often more than one way is appropriate for doing perception checking. Participants will be encouraged to ask follow-up questions and clarify any misunderstandings related to this important skill.
TRIAD BREAK-OUT REHEARSAL PERCEPTION CHECKING
Directions
Work in triads. One person (speaker) should talk freely for five minutes about any topic of interest. The second person (helper-listener) to whom he is speaking will concentrate on using the skill of perception checking. The third person (observer) will be available to provide follow-up feedback on the appropriateness of the statements of perception checking.
Each member of the triad will rotate through each of the three roles: speaker, helper-listener, and observer. The trainer will circulate throughout the room and be available for questions and concerns.
Expectations
Again, this will provide immediate feedback as participants work to develop this skill.
7. SUMMARIZE AND LIST GUIDELINES FOR THE SKILL
8. NOTES OR QUESTIONS YOU HAVE FOR THE TRAINER RELATED TO THE SKILL