CHAPTER 8:
Giving Feedback— Sweet or Sour?

This chapter tackles the definition, types, and benefits of feedback. It calls attention to the importance of starting with the performance expectation and then stating the observed performance and its impact on the goal and/or team. It includes a real-world example of how to tie feedback to performance expectations.

Two types of feedback—positive reinforcement feedback and redirective feedback—are covered. Managers need to have a process for both types of feedback—one for supporting the current behavior of the employee and a separate process for redirecting the behavior. For redirective feedback, managers can plan what they will say before they discuss the situation with their direct report to feel more comfortable. This planning gives them fuller preparation and more confidence in the feedback conversation. Managers can assure themselves that there is no need for sweaty palms because they are prepared with facts and an intention to help the employee.

This chapter also addresses the value of managers inviting feedback from their direct reports and how that impacts business results.

What Is Feedback?

Feedback is telling people on a regular basis how they are doing in relation to the expectations and goals. This vital communication is honest and friendly and given with the intention of helping employees meet their objectives. It is an opportunity to keep the communication channels open. If delivered well, feedback contributes to relationship building. People want to know how they are doing in relation to the job at hand. They want to be affirmed when they are progressing. They want supportive help to redirect when they are off course, so they can achieve.

Feedback should be given immediately when behavior is observed, in person or at least voice-to-voice. When it is given on a regular basis, the employee can feel confident that he or she is on the right track. This reduces stress and uncertainty. When given frequently, feedback becomes part of collaborative, ongoing conversations rather than a big deal. It is a habit and therefore expected and nonthreatening.

When a manager chooses positive words, friendly (and nonjudg-mental) tone of voice, and appropriate timing, feedback keeps people alert to what is important to the organization and how well they are fulfilling the expectations. This communication creates a comfortable, trustworthy environment because employees can trust that their performance will be observed and commented on with the intention of keeping them informed, developing their skills, and ensuring their optimum contribution to the team.

Chapter 2 (“Setting Expectations with Turbocharged Clarity”) emphasized that feedback goes hand-in-hand with stating clear expectations. Expectations and feedback work in tandem. You cannot separate them, because feedback is geared toward communicating the extent to which expectations are met. Every time a manager gives feedback, he reinforces the importance of the expectation. When a manager does not give feedback, employees must guess if what they are doing is achieving the goals and meeting managerial expectations. Employees may operate out of fear of failure or may assume they are on the right course if the manager does not clarify expectations and does not deliver feedback. Trust, the relationship, and the work often suffer, as in the following example.

Unrealistic Expectations and Lack of Helpful Feedback

One Sunday I was riding the Hampton Jitney bus from Montauk, Long Island, to La Guardia Airport. When my seatmate learned I was writing this book, she told me a story about her daughter, Antoinette, who worked at an art gallery in Chelsea that had about ten employees. Antoinette was hired to sell art. When one of her coworkers, the bookkeeper, left on maternity leave, Antoinette’s manager asked her to do the bookkeeping as well. Antoinette asked for more money to add those job duties. The manager said, “No. It will be good experience and will look good on your résumé.”

According to Antoinette’s mom, “The boss is cold and never compliments my daughter, who is doing two jobs. Antoinette has had no training in bookkeeping and sometimes makes mistakes. The boss reacts negatively instead of understanding that of course she will make mistakes—she is not a bookkeeper. The boss never thanks anyone. People who work there are afraid to admit errors. No one wants to take responsibility for anything that goes wrong.”

Then she asked me if I thought all women managers think they have to act cold and curt and not be friendly to be effective as a boss. She had extrapolated from one unskilled manager (who did not set realistic expectations and who gave unhelpful, perhaps damaging, feedback) to all women managers. Just then, a man across the aisle handed me the New York magazine he had been reading. The blue cover sported titles like, “Do You Have to Be a Jerk to Succeed?” Apparently having an un-knowledgeable, ineffective boss is a common theme. The issue seemed to be dedicated to articles about workplace problems.

Like Antoinette’s boss, many untrained managers are unaware of the basics of building relationships, setting realistic expectations, providing resources including training, and giving job-related constructive feedback. Many managers have a difficult job handling these important communication activities, yet communication is the cornerstone for getting things done with and through others.

Why is workplace miscommunication such an area of interest for articles, research, surveys, television shows like The Office, and cartoons like Dilbert? There’s a reason The Office is so well liked. The characters demonstrate relationship and communication problems that are played out every day in the workplace. Viewers laugh because the communication misfires are so familiar. At least the boss is likable and has all the best intentions for his staff. Still, his management skills are lackluster and affect results.

Example: Tying Expectations to Frequent Feedback

Fortunately, many managers are skilled at setting reasonable expectations and following up with friendly, job-related feedback that is constructive to the employees’ success, to the relationships, and to the success of the business. An excellent model of a company that ties together expectations with feedback is the example we used in Chapter 2 on clarity of expectations: the Balboa Bay Club & Resort (BBC&R) of Newport Beach, California. The same example is used again here to complete the model of how to tie together setting expectations with giving feedback in a productive manner.

BBC&R provides an exemplary experience to their guests by both setting high expectations for all employees and making continual feedback about those expectations part of the daily work. Managers give feedback to employees. The quality manager, Cynthia Goins, gives feedback to managers and employees. Employees also give feedback to managers and Cynthia. The open-door policy flourishes because all are aware that they are striving for the same ultimate goals and everyone wants all employees to be happy. The leaders have built trust and relationships so all staff expect feedback on an ongoing basis.

Cynthia Goins works in Human Resources (HR), so most of the employees she gives feedback to are not her direct reports. However, she has the support of executives to go to housekeeping, the kitchen, and other departments to meet with department heads. She tells them, “I heard …” or “I saw …,” and addresses what she heard or saw with the manager. This might be feedback from guests or employees. Cynthia says, “We treat employees as we would treat guests and members. We take time, listen to employees, and make them a priority. Once employees see it in a leader, they’ll do it with guests.”

Cynthia phones the hotel periodically to see how employees answer the phone. She gives feedback, so there is constant communication about the importance of how the phone is answered. Employees make every effort to go above and beyond expectations of the industry. Cynthia says, “The Balboa Bay Club & Resort is not in the business of selling service, but in the business of selling an experience for the guest— something unexpected. We accomplish this experience by really listening to and paying attention to guests, engaging them.”

BBC&R has processes in place to ensure exceptional customer experience. It teaches techniques such as finding commonalities with guests, like noticing they have the same last name. BBC&R is continually looking for ways to enhance the experience for guests. The staff discuss, “What are we doing about this comment card?” They share best practices from other places they visit and never take for granted what they learn from other hotels.

Rather than sit at a desk, Cynthia walks around and asks employees about what happened yesterday. If there was a problem with package delivery, they talk about it. Standing outside in the porte cochere, if she sees a bellman taking guests to the front desk, she reinforces great behavior. While I interviewed her by phone, she asked me to wait a minute while she wrote down something she had just heard a room reservations agent say to a guest. As soon as we got off the phone, Cynthia intended to mention to the employee what he had said and why it was effective and important and to urge him to keep that up. “If we expect guests to be acknowledged, we have to do the same thing as managers and acknowledge both guests and employees,” she said.

BBC&R encourages managers to write simple thank-you cards to employees when the manager observes outstanding behavior. Managers recognize that person in writing and give the card in public in front of peers. They also publicize it on the Daily Lineup Sheet because every employee sees that. Reinforcing good behavior is a regular part of feedback at the Balboa Bay Club & Resort. In addition to informal recognition, BBC&R also has formal recognition programs, such as employee of the quarter and of the year. The winners get a crystal award, a check, and their picture posted outside the galley—the employee dining area.

When managers give feedback, it is always about the standards. For example, if Cynthia forgets to wear her name tag, she expects other employees to give her immediate feedback so she can correct it:

I would be disappointed if they didn’t tell me, because we are supposed to be looking out for each other. We have open communication because we all understand what we are striving for and why we are doing it. We are not afraid to tell each other, “You’re slouching” or “You’ve got a five o’clock shadow and you said you wouldn’t come with one again.” They’re not offended, because of trust. Employees at BBC&R enjoy what they are doing and we enjoy working with our coworkers. It’s all part of relationship and trust.

Two Types of Feedback

There are two important types of feedback: positive reinforcement and redirective. Both have a purpose and an appropriate use, depending upon whether or not the expectations are being met. Both are important communication tools.

Positive reinforcement feedback recognizes and reinforces specific desired behaviors. This feedback specifies positive behaviors that the manager wants to see repeated. Positive reinforcement feedback communicates that expectations are being met or exceeded and lets the employee know exactly what to keep doing.

Redirective feedback asks the employee to change, or redirect, her behavior to better align herself to meet goals and expectations. This feedback is sometimes called corrective because it helps the employee adjust her approach early on so she can meet expectations and be successful. This type of feedback assists the direct report in knowing exactly what to do differently so she can change her actions.

It is important to give both types of feedback on a regular basis so employees can count on knowing their performance status. When employees expect both types of feedback, they understand feedback in the greater context of helping them achieve the goals and expectations. This enables them to view both positive reinforcement and redirective feedback as collaborative conversations.

Guidelines for Both Types of Feedback

When delivering either type of feedback, there are some guidelines. These general tips contribute to making the conversations collaborative and most effective.

Feedback is an important communication tool, so give it in person or at least voice-to-voice (not by e-mail). E-mail is frequently misunderstood and can be blown out of proportion. Always link the feedback directly and explicitly to the expectation or goal and tell why that expectation is important. (Yes, even if you have said it many times before.)

Be sure to discuss only one specific situation at a time—not “you always, you never, you often, or you usually,” even with positive reinforcement. It is also important to identify precise, observable behavior rather than making opinion or judging comments. A manager can also gather facts from project management milestones, plans, goals, required processes, procedures, and other stated expectations. Facts clarify the communication and allow both the manager and the direct report to remain objective and results oriented. Judgments or opinions can lead to conversational detours so the main point gets lost.

Be sure to give enough unambiguous and factual information to enable the employee to repeat the performance or make a requested change. While it’s nice to hear, “Good job,” it is insufficient information for a person to know exactly what that means. Similarly, comments such as, “Almost there” or “Not quite” do not identify what is expected and what the employee needs to change.

Feedback is never about the person. It is about the behavior—action or inaction related to the expectation. To keep the talk collaborative, be supportive in words and process. Keep building the relationship between you and the employee. Using a friendly, neutral tone of voice conveys your intention to help the employee succeed. Be sure to generate excitement for the person’s potential to achieve the goal—frame the feedback in a positive context.

Positive Reinforcement Feedback—You Rock; Keep That Up!

Positive reinforcement feedback is recognizing desired behaviors and commenting on them when you see them. Some people call this supportive or positive feedback. The BBC&R example (immediately telling the room reservation agent specifically what he said that demonstrated he had anticipated a guest’s need) is positive reinforcement. This type of feedback is essential if you want to see the behaviors repeated. This inexpensive form of recognition elevates the importance of the expectations and lets employees know right away that they are meeting those expectations.

Positive reinforcement feedback leads to patterns of positive behaviors. When this feedback is given frequently, it can be very motivating for people and help create forward-moving teamwork. The bottom line of this type of feedback is “you are succeeding at a specific job behavior—keep that up.” Generally, this type of feedback is received well and enhances harmony individually and for the team atmosphere.

There are many opportunities to give positive reinforcement and employees never seem to get enough of it. Some managers might say, “That’s their job. Why should I say anything at all? They should just do it.” That is an impractical point of view. It is true that people are compensated to deliver certain results. However, a manager’s job is to work with people—to collaborate, promote ownership, partner, and encourage participation. It is also a manager’s responsibility to keep expectations visible and help people meet them.

Today’s accomplished manager realizes that one of the most important communication skills to develop is influencing rather than telling employees to “just do it.” Technology and the global economy have driven many of the communication changes, including the need to persuade rather than solely instruct. We are all more or less equal in our ability to gather information and thus are able to develop expert knowledge. This means people want to be treated collegially and be appreciated for their expertise. Most professionals do their best work when they are empowered to make decisions and use their ideas and work with other professionals. It is the manager’s job to inject energy and enthusiasm into the workplace so people can enjoy working and concentrate on producing top results. Positive reinforcement infuses the environment with positive energy and recognition that an individual is progressing toward the goals.

Positive reinforcement also informs the employee what is important to you. Those are the behaviors you comment on because they impact the customer, the bottom line, the team, or the goal. You acknowledge and verbally reward the actions you want to recur. So positive reinforcement is one of a manager’s most valuable tools.

Five-Step Process for Positive Reinforcement Feedback

Follow these steps when an employee meets or exceeds expectations and you want him to repeat the behaviors or actions.

1. State the goal, performance expectation, standard, or desired behavior. Be surgically precise. Eliminate any vagueness.

2. Describe the observed behavior or action in relation to the expectation.

3. Tell why the behavior the employee demonstrated is important and how it impacts the team or group goal.

4. Ask the employee to keep repeating that behavior.

5. Thank him for his contribution.

Here is a quick example that shows what a manager might say if he followed the above five steps:

1. “As you know, this job requires you to be at your desk at 8:00 a.m. every day.”

2. “Since you are prompt, you were available to resolve that customer problem first thing this morning. That could have become a mini-crisis if you had not been here.”

3. “I appreciate that you have developed a pattern of being on time every day because we can rely on you to handle customer issues during all of our service hours.”

4. “Way to go—please keep that up!”

5. “Thank you for maintaining an outstanding attendance record. We appreciate that.”

You might prefer combining steps 1 and 2 or reversing the order if it makes you and your direct report more comfortable. Collaborative conversations do not always follow a step-by-step process, since they involve back and forth. Regardless of how you decide to do it, the main point is to relate the observed behavior directly to the performance expectation.

If you want to see desired behaviors repeated, attach importance to them by showing you notice and appreciate them. Deliver positive, reinforcing feedback to elevate the significance of the performance and how it affects the team or organization. The following script shows an example of how to do that.

Script: Positive Reinforcement

Manager: “Tim, I noticed you stayed late last night to finish that report and I wanted to thank you.”

Tim: “Well, thanks, but it’s just my job.”

Manager: “True enough, but it made a big difference that you put in the extra hours. Because that report was done on deadline, we were able to get it to Accounting in time for them to crunch the numbers today and make recommendations to our CEO at the 4:00 p.m. advisory meeting. She had some decisions to make that impact all of us and she really needed that information.”

Tim: “I guess it was important then.”

Manager: “It was vital. Thank you so much for the extra effort.”

Tim: “You’re welcome.”

Tim is much more likely to repeat the behavior of staying late to meet a deadline because his manager noticed and acknowledged the effort. Also, because Tim was informed why it was important, he can put his task in context of a bigger picture. The feedback lends meaning to the task. It also might remind the manager to tell the importance of a particular deadline in advance next time. Consider what might have happened if the manager did not mention Tim’s extra effort. Tim might feel overworked and undervalued. What happens to the relationship then? After a pattern of being ignored, Tim might opt out as a partner. Or the work might suffer if he gets tired of these late-night deadlines and loses commitment to the manager.

Redirective Feedback—Please Make a Change

The other type of feedback is redirective feedback. Some people call this corrective or constructive feedback. This type of feedback informs the employee that an expectation is not being met and asks for a change or improvement in what the employee is doing. The expectation can be wide-ranging. Some examples of expectations are: being on time, meeting a deadline, capturing a sale, serving a customer in a particular way, following a procedure, behaving professionally in a meeting or with co-workers, making quota, including certain information in a report, meeting safety requirements, or any number of job expectations. When any job expectation is not met, the manager needs to let the employee know as soon as feasible. The purpose of redirective feedback is to help the employee redirect her efforts and align them with goals and expectations. Giving redirective feedback assists the employee in knowing exactly what is off-track so she can correct actions. Oftentimes the employee has no idea that she is not meeting the expectation.

Many people view redirective feedback as “negative feedback” because it can be considered as delivering bad news. True, when a manager is not proficient in how to give redirective feedback, it may very well feel negative to both the manager and the direct report. It may feel like blaming or finding fault. If this type of feedback is not given well, it can come across as a “gotcha” (“I’ve been waiting for you to make a mistake and now I caught you”). Or it can feel punitive (“I’m disappointed with you personally”). In fact, sometimes ineffectively delivered feedback makes it seem as if the manager is angry with the employee. Poorly given feedback may even damage relationships. When a manager’s feedback skills are underdeveloped, the feedback falls short of its purpose: to improve job performance.

But, properly delivered, redirective feedback is not negative. It is a positive communication tool to keep performance high and relationships growing. When managers give any feedback well, it displays their intention to support the employee. The purpose of feedback is to help the employee accomplish objectives and succeed. Done well, redirective feedback flows as a collaborative conversation and proves to be a benefit to the employee.

Redirective feedback is collegial and beneficial. It clears the air and creates certainty. It nudges people in a more productive direction while it preserves their dignity as people and as professionals. It leverages the thinking power of the person responsible for making the change and makes achievement possible. Now that is “sweet.”

Five-Step Process for Redirective Feedback

Follow these steps when expectations are not met, so the employee has a chance to change his behavior or actions and achieve success. Notice Steps 1 and 2 are the same as in positive reinforcement feedback.

1. State the goal, performance expectation, standard, or desired behavior. Be surgically precise. Eliminate any vagueness.

2. Describe the observed behavior or action in relation to the expectation.

3. Tell why the behavior the employee demonstrated is not effective and how it impacts the team or group goal.

4. Ask the employee to tell you his views on the issue. He might have facts that you do not.

5. Ask the employee what actions he will take to meet the expectation. Move toward future performance.

As in positive reinforcement feedback, you might prefer combining steps or reversing the order to make the conversation collaborative. Regardless of how you decide to do it, the main point is to clearly relate the specific, observed behavior directly to the performance expectation.

Here is a quick example, based on a real situation, that shows what a manager might say if she followed the above five steps.

1. “As you know, this job requires you to be at your desk at 8:00 a.m. every day so you are available in the event of any network problems.”

2. “When we had the network crash this morning at 8:15 a.m., you weren’t here.”

3. “So, your teammates were scrambling to solve the problem. That took them off their own deadlines for today. And it delayed getting the problem solved, since they had to wait until you got here anyway because no one knew how to handle ‘X.’ ”

4. “Is there anything I should know about your being late?”

Employee: “Not really. Nothing ever happens that early, and I noticed management is often not here until 8:30 a.m., so I began to think it wasn’t important to be here.”

5. “You bring up a good point. It might appear sometimes that managers are not working at 8:00 a.m. because they are working elsewhere. But your responsibilities require that you work right here every day. What do you think you can do about it?”

Employee: “Okay. I saw what a mess it was for everyone around here today and realize I’d better be at my desk on time. You can count on it.”

Manager: “Thanks, and let’s get Pranet and Joey cross-trained on the ‘X’ portion of the job so they can back you up in the event of an emergency. I’ll talk to them later. Could you bring them up to speed by the end of next week?”

Employee: “Good idea. Yes, I’ll talk to them after you do.”

Script: Redirective Feedback Conversation

Here is an example of a feedback conversation. Although it is fictional, it is based on a real issue.

Manager: “Eduardo, I got a call from Hugh today saying you were fifteen minutes late on the weekly conference call you were supposed to host this morning. He said you were fifteen minutes late last week also.”

Eduardo: “I was stuck in traffic.”

Manager: “Eduardo, I can understand you might have difficulty talking on the phone when you are stuck in traffic. But we need you to host that call at exactly 9:00 a.m. every Wednesday wherever you are—whether you’re in the office, in the field, or on the road. There are five other people who have scheduled that weekly time. They are waiting for you to host the meeting.”

Eduardo: “I’ll try.”

Manager: “It is very costly to the company to have people’s schedules disrupted. All those colleagues need to exchange information so they can meet their requirements. Plus we need their cooperation on many of our projects, so it’s vital that they can trust our department to do what we say we will do. You are the key person on the call and it is necessary that you host it on time, every week. I need for you to more than try. I expect you to commit to meeting this critical job expectation.”

Eduardo: “Or?”

Manager: “Eduardo, the job requires hosting that call at 9:00 a.m. every Wednesday. You have all the knowledge and expertise that is needed. Is there something going on that is preventing you from being on time for that call?”

Eduardo: “I didn’t want to say anything, but due to a personal situation I now have to take my daughter to day care every morning for the next month. That means I can’t be here by 9:00 a.m., and I hate talking in the car because I need to get online plus refer to some files for that meeting.”

Manager: “I understand that must be tricky. What could you do to still host the call on time?”

Eduardo: “The day care is near home. I can double back there and host the call from home with no problem.”

Manager: “Okay. Let’s go with that plan for the next month. Let’s touch base next Wednesday to confirm that you are back on track for placing the call.”

Eduardo: “Okay then.”

Use redirective feedback whenever expectations are not met so the employee has a chance to change his behavior or actions right away. When giving this feedback, use the process and always preserve the relationship. Season the feedback with your intuition about what to say and how to say it based on your intention to keep things positive and future-focused.

Phrases to Help You Be Direct and Clear

When giving redirective feedback, a manager must be crystal clear about the desired expectation, the actual performance, and the gap between them. If you are reluctant to state clearly what you mean in a feedback conversation, consider some of these phrases. Some of them are too strong for a first-time conversation, especially if it is with a direct report who is collaborating well on changing performance or behavior. But these phrases are helpful to have in your hip pocket in case the going gets tough:

“I heard you say …”

“I saw …”

“I understand your reservation to doing this differently, but the project calls for …”

“I expect … because …”

“This job requires …”

“The team needs you to … What will you do to make that happen?”

“The performance expectation is … What will you do to meet it?”

“The goal requires that you … because …”

“When you do “X,” the impact of your behavior on the team is …”

Absence of Redirective Feedback Sours Performance

Managers are not doing their direct reports a favor by withholding comments when expectations are not met. No feedback at all is just as toxic as feedback given poorly. This lack of communication can have unfavorable consequences. The following example shows that when a manager ducks the responsibility to redirect behavior, the employee suffers.

One woman from the southern United States is a highly regarded sales account manager. She walked confidently into her annual performance appraisal meeting. She had always received an outstanding rating and her sales numbers were over quota. In the absence of feedback from her boss, she had every reason to believe she would receive the same rating she had received in the past. Instead, her boss blindsided her. He had lowered her rating. She was shocked and upset.

“Why?” she asked.

“Do you remember that report you did six months ago on_______?” he asked.

“Yes.”

“Well I didn’t like the way you did it,” the manager said.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” she queried. “I would have redone it the way you wanted.”

“I didn’t want to hurt your feelings.”

“Well now you have really hurt my feelings,” she said. “You have cost me my track record in this company as an outstanding performer. This has cost me financially in terms of a raise. You have really hurt my feelings now.”

The manager had already submitted all his staff ratings to upper management and they had been approved. So, although he could change some of the wording, the rating stood. This is an example of poor management. Whose feelings was he really protecting? His own. He did not take responsibility for clarifying his expectations prior to the report getting done, or later, when his (private) expectations were not met. He did not exhibit strong management skills by holding a collaborative conversation about how he wanted the report handled. In fact, there was nothing collaborative about the performance management during the year. He surprised the employee during the performance appraisal. This should never happen. Employees should always know what to expect in the performance review.

Performance management is not about “gotcha.” Effective managers work in partnership with employees. The conversations about expectations flow back and forth and get clarified for mutual understanding. Feedback is a tool that shows managers are trying to help employees do their best work. Failure to give feedback is abdication of managerial responsibility.

Noncollaborative Feedback Sours Relationships

One-way feedback, in which the employee has no say, is not likely to improve performance. In fact, it is probable that it will cause confusion, misunderstandings, and relationship damage. Lack of two-way communication can result in negative impacts, as this example of noncollaborative feedback shows.

One day when I entered the office of a small-business owner I know, he asked me how the front-desk employee treated me on my way into the office.

“Was she friendly to you?”

“Of course,” I said. “She is a great ambassador for your business. She is always cheerful and helpful.”

“She ignored me today,” he said.

“Oh?”

“Yes,” he continued. “I gave her some feedback two days ago. Then she missed work the next day. She always calls in sick the day after I give her feedback.”

“How did you give her the feedback?” I asked.

“I sent her an e-mail.”

“Have you considered just talking to her in person instead of sending feedback by e-mail?”

“No,” he replied. “She always talks on and on and I don’t have time for that.”

He told me the scenario, which sounded like a misunderstanding about the expectation. It could easily have been handled in person in a positive, brief, and gentle way. This manager had no training in giving feedback, so he probably did not relate his comments in the e-mail to a previously expressed expectation. In fact, the expectation was probably not verbalized. Now feedback by e-mail was costing this small-business owner one day’s salary for the absent employee, plus the cost of hiring a temp for the front desk. So it put a ding in the finances as well as the relationship. A collaborative conversation could have straightened out the misunderstanding and led to an instantaneous solution.

Benefits of Feedback

When properly delivered, feedback benefits the direct report in many ways. This communication aligns individual behavior and efforts with organizational interests and success, which is why people are at work in the first place. When an employee listens to feedback, she can develop skills and knowledge and achieve success that might not be accomplished without feedback. As the employee garners a sense of accomplishment, she is energized to persevere when times get tough.

Letting employees know where they stand, on a continual basis, reduces fear of the unknown. Knowledge, of how they are meeting or not meeting expectations, empowers employees to fine-tune their actions so they can achieve. This presents employees with a chance to improve performance and make midcourse corrections, which shows the manager has individuals’ best interests at heart.

Feedback develops partnerships between employee and manager. It strengthens relationships as partners collaborate on reaching goals. Feedback invites participation and offers an opportunity for employees to voice their perspectives, concerns, and need for support. It offers the manager the opportunity to gather information from direct reports and collaborate on solutions. Collegial relationships eliminate blaming and finger-pointing and keep everyone focused on achieving the objectives.

Timely and regular feedback, of both types, lays the groundwork for a collaborative performance appraisal with honesty and continual learning as a focus. It leads to no surprises on the performance appraisal and better performance throughout the year.

Inviting and Receiving Feedback—How Are We Doing?

Communication is, of course, two way. Once trust and relationships have been established, asking for feedback is an important collegial conversation for the business. It can reap big benefits for the team, and you as a manager, and maybe for process improvements and innovation. Being able to not only deliver, but also hear challenging feedback is essential if a manager is to be influential and add value to the team and the organization as a whole.

Managers who want their direct reports to buy in and “own” not only their individual goals and results, but also those of the organization as a whole, must actively seek and invite feedback. A collaborative manager, with his eye on the strategic results of the business, asks for feedback from his team on a regular basis. It can be as simple as “How are we doing as a team?” or “How is my management style working or not working for you?” or “How can I better support you?” or “What could we do better?”

Listen carefully and restate what direct reports say in a nondefensive manner. “So it sounds like you are saying you would like me to delegate more authority to you?” “If I’ve got it right you think we should change this process to ‘X’ because… .” “Are you saying that there are organizational obstacles that prevent the team from …?”

Take it to the next level. “You make a good case for changing…. What would you like me to do differently?” or “I’m glad you are assessing how our team is working. Let’s get together with the whole group and you can facilitate a meeting on your ideas. Let’s hear what they have to say and get their input too.” or “So if the team has conflict about which way to proceed, that can be a good thing. Maybe we are on the brink of something new. Let’s get the team together and examine the alternative next approaches.”

Express appreciation. “Thank you for giving me feedback. I will think about it and get back to you.” Or, “You’re right. We will all benefit if I change… .”

Feedback to you as a manager is essential to your success and achieving desired results. It helps you know what is going on with your employees and vice versa. It emphasizes to employees that their ability to add value to the work is wanted, heard, and acted upon. When their feedback makes a difference, their level of commitment to you, your team, and the company increases.

Summary

Effective feedback relates to process (having structured work expectations) and relationship (candidness about performance develops trust). Winning feedback also requires collaborative conversations and intuition. You know what needs to be said—that’s your intuition, based on your experience with this employee and with the type of work situation before you. You may need to focus on how best to say what needs to be said. That is where following a business-based process and recalling the importance of preserving the relationship connect. You’re careful with your word choice and you keep the feedback job-related and specific.

Part I covered the importance of communicating clear expectations and how feedback describes the extent to which those expectations are met or not met. In Part II, Chapter 4 on workflow process and project management mentioned how having structured approaches creates a common language for communicating what is expected functionally on the job. This clarity helps managers and employees to discuss the expected steps and give objective, factual feedback on project progress. In addition to having facts about set expectations and observed behavior, a manager must be intuitive about what words and tone of voice to use so he will be heard and the employee will not become defensive. Successful feedback requires collaborative conversations. Two-way trust and collegiality grow through collaboration, and so do relationships and meaningful business results.

Feedback ties in directly with setting expectations, delegation, and coaching. In fact, feedback is an indispensable element of coaching, which Chapter 9 explains.