STEP FIVE

Use the Law of
Attraction—Be Positive

A lot has been written about the importance of being positive. The Law of Attraction is a concept that has been traced through history from Shakespeare, Newton, Edison, and Einstein, to Jerry and Esther Hicks, Jack Canfield, Wayne Dyer, and many other popular psychologists and speakers.

Understand the Law of Attraction

The Law of Attraction is a principle that suggests you are attracting what you have in your life. Proponents of the concept teach that it is the power of thought that makes things happen, as if you were shaping your destiny one thought at a time. The Law of Attraction goes beyond behavior—to reciprocity, altruism, or other concepts of exchange or giving. It applies to what we actually think. Key principles of the Law of Attraction include:

Like attracts like. As you think a thought, you are attracting the same kinds of energy.

This holds true for attracting both positive and negative energy. Have you ever focused on something that was bothering you, and it got worse and worse, seemingly with no solution in sight? Then, when you let it go, stopped thinking about it, and changed the thought to “it will get better,” did it?

Picture the following scenario.

Yari is disenfranchised because he bought a computer that gives him more error messages and aggravation than his sixth-grade teacher. He has come to Top Buy to return the computer. He approaches Jerome, a salesperson in the store.

      Jerome is an efficient salesperson. He senses that Yari is angry, so he prepares for the fight. When Yari approaches, Jerome does not smile and greet him. He just looks at him. He is expecting an argument.

      Yari begins the conversation by saying, “I need to return this computer. There seems to be something wrong with the operating system.”

      Jerome, thinking that Yari is trying to get away with getting a new computer and annoyed by what he perceives as impudence, barks, “How do you know it’s not user error?”

      The interaction escalates, and a manger has to intervene.

After the altercation, Jerome is angry. His sense of order has been upset. He says to himself, “All customers are like this. They are ungrateful and discourteous, wanting to take advantage of hard working people like me.”

That day, several customers come to Jerome’s station with items to return. He treats them the way he sees them—the way he thinks about them. He has quite a bad day.

The more you think a thought, the more similar thoughts will come into your consciousness.

Have you ever gone down any of these paths?

• I don’t like it here.
• Nobody knows what they are doing.
• Nobody cares.
• It’s a far cry from the way things used to be.
• Look at our world.
• Our politicians don’t even know what to do.
• We’re all at war.
• This will never end.

You could really go into a downward spiral if you continue this thought pattern, which is less than uplifting.

The same thing happens with thoughts about people. If you are negative, you will attract negativity. If you are positive, you will attract positivity. This may not be true 100 percent of the time. But, you can be assured that if you are positive, you will get a lot more positive energy back. If you focus your thoughts on what you want, you are more likely to get it.

The Law of Attraction doesn’t compute “don’t,” “not,” “no,” or any other negative words.

Don’t wish for customers who don’t talk back, bosses who don’t criticize, and colleagues who don’t gossip.

Read that sentence again. According to the Law of Attraction, what will you get? (You will get customers who talk back, bosses who criticize, and colleagues who gossip.)

The same law applies to how you think about yourself. If you think the following positive thoughts, you will project those thoughts to others who will treat you accordingly. Most important, you will feel good about yourself, which is invaluable. That is really the key.

• I am capable.
• I can solve this.
• I am good at what I do.
• I like who I am.

Stay Positive

Use Positive Language

In line with the Law of Attraction, turning a bad situation into a good one can be as easy as telling a customer what you can do instead of what you can’t do.

Using positive language is an art. It involves concentrating on how you communicate. In positive communication, you don’t blame, you solve. For example:

Example: You didn’t fill the form out properly.

Better: Let me help you with a few sections so this can be processed as quickly as possible.

See Tool 5.1 for more examples. Refer to Worksheet 5.1 to make your own positive language chart.

Avoid Negative Triggers

There are some phrases and words that are immediate triggers for negative responses.

Find an alternative to “no.”

When you say, “No, you can’t do that,” even a small child has an immediate response: “Yes, I can.” No is a strong word that carries emotion with it. There are few times when “no” makes you feel good.

Try not saying no at all for a day or two. It might be difficult, and you might have to end up saying it, but you’ll come up with alternatives. It isn’t easy. But, it’s worth the time and effort.

TOOL 5.1

Positive Language
External Customers

WORKSHEET 5.1

Negative to Positive

Instructions: Make your own positive language chart like the one in Tool 5.1. Turn negative statements into positive ones.

If you don’t know, find out.

“I don’t know” is not an acceptable answer if you leave it at that. Customers want to know that you will try to get an answer, even if you don’t have one at the time. Instead of saying, “I don’t know,” be positive about what you can find out. Use phrases such as

• “Let me find that out for you.”
• “I know someone who can help you with that.”
• “Let me call the department that can help you.”
• “I don’t have that answer now, but I will call you back.”

Think of an alternative to “next.”

Some people have visions of a lamb going to slaughter when they hear “next.” Other ways to let customers know that it is their turn include

• “May I help you?”
• “It’s your turn.”
• “My station’s available.”

Avoid negativity.

The following comments can cause conflict right away:

• “I don’t know, and I don’t care.”
• “That’s not my job.”
• “Sorry, I can’t.”
• “You should have known better.”
• “That’s a stupid question.”
• “Read the sign.”
• “Let’s get a move on.”
• “I already told you that.”
• “You’ll have to do that yourself.”

Watch Your Body Language

Your body language can give away what you are really feeling. It is often hard to be “up” all the time. People do experience “contact overload” when working with the public. If that happens to you, take a break. Go for a walk. Or, if you can’t leave your area, make a conscious effort to change your mindset. Customers will pick up on your feelings and thoughts, especially if you are thinking any of the following. They are giveaways.

• I wish you would go.
• I don’t like you.
• This job is boring.
• I could be at lunch if you would just get on with it.
• Can you speed it up?
• Can’t you see I’m talking?

Use Positive Regard on the Phone

Working on the phone requires practicing the Law of Attraction too. If you envision customers needing your help, and you being able to give it, you will start out with positive regard. Positive regard means that you put the person you are talking with in a positive light. See Tool 5.2 for suggestions to keep phone conversations positive.

Work with Offensive Callers

If the customer is offensive or rude to the point of being insulting or discourteous to you, examples of responses you could use include:

• “I understand you are upset. I know we can work this out. If you respect me, and I respect you, we can solve this together. We need to listen to each other first.”
• “If this is not a good time to talk, you can call me back. Maybe if we both think about solutions without becoming upset, it will be of more benefit. Call me back when we can problem solve together.”
• “It would help me if . . . ”
• “Time out! I want to hear what you are saying, but I have to ask you to slow down a bit.”

If customers are not ready to converse in a civil way, and you have to call the person back or ask them to call you back, inform your boss. If you follow all the listening and problem-solving guidelines, it is rare that this will happen. Obviously, it is a last resort and may carry consequences. This one is up to you and your company to decide in terms of acceptability, but it deserves a discussion. Review Tool 5.2 for phone tips that will help you communicate positively with customers.

TOOL 5.2

A Dozen Musts for Phone Communication

1. Answer the phone with enthusiasm. Every customer deserves your best, every time.
2. Vary your tone and volume as you would in a conversation.
3. Take time to articulate.
4. Smile. Customers will feel it.
5. Listen as you would if the person were in front of you.
6. If you have to put someone on hold, ask the customer for permission to do that. Come back every 30 seconds to a minute with a progress report.
7. Greet the customer before you ask them if you can put them on hold.
8. If you transfer, make sure you transfer to the right person. Stay on the line until the transfer goes through to ensure the connection. Tell the customer where you are transferring to, and the phone number and name of the individual who will receive the call (if customers get disconnected, they will have an immediate reference to call back).
9. If the caller wants to speak with someone who is not available, offer to help.
10. Follow up with all requests and call the customer back if you have promised to do so.
11. Allow the customer to speak with a superior if necessary.
12. Close the call with a statement of appreciation.

Keep Emails Short and to the Point

Think about the following when you write an email:

Approximate Number of Words

Email Tips

1. Your employer owns your email and can view it at any time. In legal proceedings, it can be used in court.
2. Only send messages to “everyone” or “all employees” if you have authorization and permission.
3. WRITING IN CAPS AND IN RED IS THE EQUIVALENT OF SCREAMING.
4. Use an auto reply when you are away from the office.
5. Use question marks only for questions. Use only one question mark as you would in other written correspondence.
6. Send chain letters from home.
7. Use the subject line.
8. Put deadlines, meetings, and the most important information at the beginning of your email.
9. If you are angry, wait a day or two before sending out an email about the topic of your concern. Use positive language.
10. Keep sentences between 14 and 20 words.
11. Use short paragraphs.
12. Bullet items for quick reference.
13. Respond to email within a day if possible or within four hours if you are answering an Internet request.
14. Respond only to the person who sent you an email, unless there is a reason to do otherwise.
15. Use “reply all” only when there is a reason to.
16. Email up the chain of command at your own risk.
17. Be kind.

For free tips on writing, visit www.basic-learning.com.

Positive thoughts go a long way, whether they are communicated in person or in writing. If you stay upbeat, you will be recognized for your ability and talent to turn situations around or make the workplace a better place. Ultimately, you should get more of what you want in terms of productive, worthwhile communications and relationships.

Complete Worksheets 5.2 and 5.3 to explore your positive qualities. Have fun and enjoy the results!

WORKSHEET 5.2

Positive Qualities

Instructions: Write down all the positive qualities you have. Post the list where you can easily see it. Don’t be embarrassed to look at it often. You can also do this as a team activity. You could also write a list of positive qualities that someone else has, and give the list to that person to post. You might start a trend!

WORKSHEET 5.3

The Power of a Positive Word

The following story is from an anonymous email.

A teacher asked her students to write down one positive thing about each person in her class. Names were clearly written on separate pieces of paper. When everyone wrote one nice thing on each person’s paper, the papers were given to the owners whose names were on the top of the sheet.

     Years later, these papers were found in the pockets of wounded war veterans and in places where you would never think something written years before would be found. Positive regard is powerful.

Do this activity with your team, your family, and your friends. You may discover positive aspects about yourself that you weren’t aware of!

Put It All Together

Staying positive, even in challenging situations, is an important aspect of customer service. Step 6 delves further into staying positive and provides a step-by-step model and tools you can use for problem solving.