Overview

This exercise attempts to close the gap between perception and reality by encouraging managers to assess themselves as they believe others see them and then to assess themselves as they see themselves.

Purpose

To develop awareness of the gap between perceptions of ethical behavior and the reality on which those perceptions are based.

Group Size

Any number of individuals can participate. Group members will first work alone and then in triads. (Note: This exercise works best with people who know each other well or participants who have worked together for most of the session. It’s best not to use it early in the training day but rather after participants have had an opportunity to get to know one another.)

Room Arrangement

Arrange seating that can accommodate the formation of three-person subgroups.

Materials

Handout 37.1, “Ethics Profile” (Note: Each person should receive two copies: one to work on in class and the second to be taken back to the office, copied, and distributed to his or her staff.)

Procedure

1.Lead a brief discussion of the causes for discrepancies in the way we see ourselves and the way others see us. Some participants may be familiar with the Johari Window, with quadrants depicting what we know about ourselves, what others know about us, what we don’t know about ourselves, and what others don’t know about us. This could be used to illustrate the possible reasons for discrepancies. For example, if you know that you are rushing out of a building without stopping for pleasantries of any kind because you’ve just had a call that your child was injured, you could be regarded as purposeful. Those same actions, though, viewed by someone who didn’t know your purpose, could be regarded as abrasive.

You may also choose to note that words and actions are seldom regarded the same way by two different people. For example, prosecuting attorneys and defense attorneys present differing views of the same event—it’s up to the jury to decide which presentation more accurately depicted the truth. And the jury’s decision is not always the correct one. Fortunately or unfortunately, we live in a world of multiple interpretations for particular persons, places, and things.

2.Explain that you’re going to distribute a self-assessment for the purpose of helping participants determine if a gap exists between their self-perception and the perception others may have of them.

3.Stress repeatedly that perceptions are not truth. If someone perceives managers in a more negative fashion than they perceive themselves, the other person is not necessarily right. The exercise is intended only to open dialogue, to explore why the difference might exist. It is not intended to label participants.

Encourage participants to substantiate their answers if they can with specific references that may have led to their perceptions. This substantiation should be done both as they fill out the assessment individually, and then after, as they discuss it in triads.

4.Distribute the assessment form, Handout 37.1, “Ethics Profile,” and allow time for participants to complete it.

5.Form triads and encourage sensitive and supportive analyses and differences of opinion.

6.Ask each triad to characterize the nature of their discussions: For example, were they conducted in a professional, sensitive, nonthreatening manner? Were differences of opinion respectfully listened to? Were triad members interrupting one another? Were convincing examples presented? Did each person in the triad have an opportunity to contribute?

7.Debrief by asking one person in each triad to share his or her opinion of the way in which the triads discussed their responses.

8.Conclude with a strong recommendation that participants and managers use the form with their staff members and that they conduct subsequent discussions in the most professional manner possible.

Variation

Ideally, participants will take the assessment back to the workplace and make a copy for everyone whom they manage. To encourage honest responses, appoint one person to collect the completed (anonymous) surveys and to give them all at once to the manager. At a subsequent meeting (either one-on-one or with the staff as a whole), the manager—if he or she is brave enough—can stimulate dialogue regarding ways to improve.

Discussion

What causes some people to wear “blinders” when it comes to their own behavior?

Think of a time in your work life when someone misjudged you. Did he or she ever come to know the real you? What barriers were created by that incident?

How often do you think the average person does an assessment of the way he or she sees himself or herself and of the way others see him or her?

Quotation

“Underpromise, overdeliver.”

–Joel Pliskin

Points of Interest

Writing in Executive Excellence, Paul Evans, a professor of organizational behavior at INSEAD, maintains “Your assets are your potential liabilities.”

Your successes lead to a predictable self-confidence. But excessive self-confidence, especially for those in authority, can lead a “pendulum swing toward failure.”

HANDOUT 37.1