Index

adoption model for emotional intelligence 195–6

amygdala 13

behaviour, effect on others 46–7

body-temperature cycle 91–2

bouncing back see emotional resilience

brain, frontal 12

brain, mid 12, 13; see also limbic system

brain functions, understanding 12–13

breathing, controlling 27, 79–81

Broughton, Richard 163

CardioSense Trainer (CST) 208

circadian rhythm 91–2

clients, understanding 18

cognitive intelligence 9, 10–11, 13–15

comfort zone, working outside 73

communication building trust through 122–3, 124

through connection 126

through factual exchange 125

through feelings 126

through ideas and opinions 125–6

through ritual and cliché 124

concentration, losing 97

congruency 183

connection in communication 126–7

conscientiousness 38

assessing 177–8

definition of 173, 174

effect on others 182–3

factors affecting 179–82

importance of 174–5, 176–7

consistency, achieving 186–7

courage, effect on self-awareness 49

crisis management 70–71

criticism, accepting 83, 208

cross-cultural working 19

curiosity, effect on selfawareness 50

Damasio, Antonia 25

distracting thoughts, elimination of 102

distractions, eliminating 116

Dulewicz, Victor 9, 44, 65, 87, 108, 134, 157, 173

EI see emotional intelligence emotion, definition of 24–5

emotional feelings 28

emotional intelligence 10–11, 13–15

adopting 195–9

definition of 7–8

Energy Generator 3, 38–9

framework, Higgs & Dulewicz 3, 38

importance of 15–16

integrating into one’s life 195, 200–201

questionnaire 3, 78, 99, 121, 148, 164, 185, 200

self-perception questionnaire 35, 36–8, 53, 54, 77, 98, 120, 147, 163, 184

emotional resilience 65–83, 77–8, 346

definition of 65–6

effect on others 75–6

factors affecting 73

importance of 68

low 69–70

strengthening 76, 77–8, 83

emotional state, managing 88

emotional states, learning about 43–4

emotions

being overcome by 67–8

effect on others 29

facial expressions and 26

self-expression and 141–2

use of 26

using to exert control 33–4

emotions diary 53, 77, 99, 121, 147, 184

keeping an 54–6

empathetic climate, building an 114–29

empathy 107

energy 89–96

creating 90

harnessing 100–101

importance of 89

managing 91–2

energy levels, maintaining 93–4

environment, creating the right 143–4

exercise, importance of 93

expectations

discussion of with colleagues 181–2

managing 182

factual exchanges in communication 125

feedback 13, 60, 83, 121, 195, 201, 206

asking for 48, 49, 50, 53, 54, 60, 78, 99, 121, 148, 164, 175, 185, 197, 206

value of 4

feelings 27–8

controlling 81

emotional 28

encouraging others to share 150

in communication 126

intuitive 28

physiological 27, 31

sharing 149

feelings-based conversation 149

flexible approach, adopting a 142–3

Gardner, Howard 9

Gigerenzer, Gerd 161–2

goals, visualizing 102

Goleman, Daniel 9, 11

health, emotions and 32–3

Higgs & Dulewicz emotional intelligence framework 3, 38

Higgs & Dulewicz Seven Elements of Emotional Intelligence 4

Higgs, Malcolm 9, 44, 65, 87, 108, 134, 157, 173

hijack, emotional 67–8

honesty, effect on self-awareness 49

ideas and opinions in communication 125–6

incongruent feelings, dealing with 176

industrial change, effects on individuals 16

influence

assessing own 136–8

definition of 134–5

effect on others 143–4

exerting over others 133–53

factors affecting 139

importance of 135–6

use of language in 145–7

Ingram, Harry 205

inner voice see intuition; intuitiveness

insight into others’ feelings, gaining 150–51

inspiring others 194

integration model for emotional intelligence 195, 200–201

integrity, personal 174

intelligence quotient see IQ

internal chatter 57, 59

interpersonal intelligence, 7, 9, 10, 15

interpersonal relationships 107–29

interpersonal sensitivity 37, 108

effect on others 120–22

importance of 108–9

influences on 110–12

intrapersonal intelligence 7, 9–10, 15

intuition 72

trusting 19, 157–69

intuitive feelings 28, 72

intuitiveness 38

assessing 165–6

awareness of 166–7

balancing with logic 162–3

definition of 157

factors affecting 159–60

freeing 167–8

importance of 158–9

IQ tests 10–11

Johari Window template 53, 54, 78, 99, 121, 122, 147, 148, 164, 165, 185, 205–7

knowing yourself 43–54

language, using to influence 145–7

laughter, value of 34

leading colleagues 153

limbic system 12, 13, 13–14, 15, 34, 75

listening 114–15

importance of 114, 129

listening, patience and 116

logic and intuitiveness 162–3

Luft, Joseph 205

Meyer, Jack 9, 25

mood 29–30, 34

motivation 37, 87–102

effect on others 98

negative emotions 29–30, 32, 33, 44, 55, 57, 59, 66, 67, 71, 96, 141

minimizing 56

neo-cortex 12

networking 123

“no”, ability to say 80–81

non-verbal signals 141–2

obstacles, overcoming 97

organizational change, effects on individuals 17–18

pacing colleagues 152

patience, importance of in listening 116

perceptions, being aware of 60

personal culture, creating 193–201

personal behaviour, effect on others 46–7

personal development 79–82, 100–102, 122–9, 149, 165–8, 186–8

achieving 54

personal goals, defining 95–7

physiological feelings 27, 31

physiological responses to emotional stimuli 23–4

physiological signals of pressure 72

physiology, emotions and 31–2, 34

positive emotions 28, 94, 95, 141–2

maximizing 57–8

posture, importance of 93–4

preparing for the unexpected 81–2

pressure dealing with 71

physiological signals of 72

working under 74

pride 29

questionnaire 3, 78, 99, 121, 148, 164, 185, 200

self-perception questionnaire 35, 36–8, 53, 54, 77, 98, 120, 147, 163, 184

rapport

developing in an existing relationship 127–9

establishing 110–11

establishing through communication 122–9

using 140

relationship management 9–10, 18–19

relationships 107

building 109

resourcefulness, achieving 56

respect, earning 144–5

responsibility for mistakes, taking 75

ritual and cliché in communication 124

role model, becoming a 189

Salovy, Peter 9

self-awareness achieving 53

definition of 44–6

effect on others 52, 54

importance of 9, 17, 36, 42, 44, 48

influences on 49–50

self-belief, strengthening 58–61

self-belief cycle 59, 60, 61, 70–71

self-management 9–10, 16–18

self-perception questionnaire 35, 36–8, 53, 54, 77, 98, 120, 147, 163, 184

Seven Elements of Emotional Intelligence, Higgs & Dulewicz 4

sixth sense see intuition; intuitiveness

strategies for understanding others

asking questions 118

paraphrasing 117

reflecting 117

restating 117

summarizing 117–18

support network, personal 116

technological change, effects on individuals 17

triggers 55–6

trust 107

building 112–13

building through communication 122–3, 124

unexpected, preparing for the 81–2

understanding others 117–18

value and ethics, alignment of 179–80

values, defining one’s own 187–8

visualization 59

willingness to learn, effect on self-awareness 50, 51–2