APPENDIX

Solutions to Putting
Learning into Practice
Exercises

Chapter 2: Leaning Into Criticism

1. You work for a large rental company. A customer marches in and says, “The tent you put up for us leaked and everyone got drenched, along with their meals! You’ve completely ruined our son’s graduation party.” What is your response?

A: Paraphrase the situation: “My goodness, it sounds like this made a complete mess of your big event! Tell me more about what happened.”

2. The utility company you work for mistakenly sent disconnection notices to several thousand people because of a computer error, and—lucky you—you are on the phones today answering one call after another from customers who are furious about this. What is the first thing you say to each person?

A: Mirror the person’s emotions: “We made a mistake that has been incredibly frustrating for you and thousands of other customers, and we want to apologize for that.”

3. You are a young doctor and get a surprise visit from a patient you saw yesterday. “Look at me!” she exclaims. She is covered from head to toe in a rash caused by the medication you prescribed for her the day before. What do you say now?

A: Steal her best lines: “Wow, this medication has had some terrible side effects for you! How are you feeling right now?”

Chapter 3: Achieving Deep Acknowledgment

1. A customer storms up to you and declares, “Your crew did a terrible job of landscaping on my property! See how uneven this line of shrubs is? I’m going to tell all my neighbors to stay away from your company!” How might you paraphrase what she is saying?

A: “It sounds like we didn’t do what you were expecting at all here, starting with these shrubs. Tell me more.”

2. How would you make an observation about what she is thinking and feeling?

A: “We obviously made you very unhappy with this job.”

3. What might you say to validate her feelings?

A: “No one wants his or her home to look bad.”

4. What could you say that would show her that you personally identify with her, in a way that doesn’t bash your employer?

A: “I wouldn’t want my own property to look less than perfect either. Let’s see what we can do here.”

Chapter 4: Avoiding Trigger Phrases

1. A customer’s child is running amok in your store, pulling merchandise off the shelves and throwing it around. What do you say to the parent?

A: Don’t give orders to the customer: “Your child is obviously having a good time. Let’s try to distract him from the merchandise together.”

2. A customer finally gets to the front of a line, but it turns out to be the wrong one. Now you have to tell him that he must wait in yet another long line. What can you say that won’t make this person angry?

A: Avoid blaming the customer or using catchphrases like “I’m sorry”: “I know exactly where you need to go for this. Unfortunately, it involves one more line, and I apologize that you had to wait in this one. The clerk handling that line over there will be able to take care of you.”

3. A customer is angrily complaining that his new digital camera doesn’t work. As he demonstrates the problem, it is clear that he is pressing the wrong button to try to turn it on. What do you first say to him?

A: Normalize the situation: “These cameras confuse lots of people. I see this all the time. Let me show you how to get this working.”

4. A woman is talking loudly on her cell phone in the dining room of the golf club where you work. This is against the rules of the club, and other people are complaining. How can you “educate” this person without being insulting?

A: Avoid using a one-sided explanation: “Since our dining room is a quiet zone, we have an area outside the dining room where you can use your cell phone freely. I’ll be glad to show you where you can go when you need to take a call.”

Chapter 5: Divide and Conquer: The Safe Way to Deliver Bad News

1. Someone is trying to return a broken laptop to your store for a refund. The screen is cracked, there is a muddy footprint on it, and it is clear that the customer caused the damage. What might be a good way to begin your response?

A: Use a good introduction to frame the situation: “It looks like you had some accidental damage here. Let me walk you through what the warranty covers in a situation like this.”

2. What kind of explanation might you give about refusing him a refund?

A: Give lots of details: “We do have warranties that cover accidental damage. They cost extra and have to be purchased before an incident like this. In your case, you have a manufacturer’s warranty that covers defects in the product—for example, if it came from the factory not working. Because damaged merchandise is nonreturnable, we’ll need to look at some options beyond the warranty coverage here.”

3. The customer responds by complaining about how expensive laptops are and wondering why a big, profitable chain like yours can’t just take this computer back. How would you reply?

A: Give an empathetic response. “You’re right, laptops are a big expense. I wish we had better coverage for accidents like this. No one expects situations like this to happen after spending this much money. I don’t blame you for trying to return this.”

4. What options might you offer this customer to try to make the best of the situation?

A: Review the options as an ally. “Here are some options that might lessen the financial impact of this situation. First, even though the screen is damaged, the rest of the computer appears to be working. If you wish, an inexpensive converter might allow you to still use this computer with another monitor or your television set. Second, even broken computers do have some salvage value, and people sometimes sell them via channels such as eBay. Third, you might explore taking a tax deduction for this situation as a casualty loss or a business expense. Depending on your tax bracket, this might represent a substantial discount on your next computer. Finally, given what happened, I would be willing to offer you our best discount if you decide to purchase a new computer.”

Chapter 6: Powerful Problem Solving: Beyond “Yes We Can” and “No We Can’t”

1. Your valet parking attendant just dented a customer’s expensive car. The owner is demanding a brand new car, claiming that you “ruined” it and that it will never be right again. How do you respond?

A: After apologizing for the damage, acknowledge the customer’s view as he sees it and focus on what you can do: “This is a really expensive, high-performance car, and I would certainly want this situation to be made whole if it were me too. The least we can do is have this damage assessed by an expert who can get your input. What dealer do you normally work with?”

2. A customer is complaining that he and his family were forced to sit in front of several loud, drunken fans at your ballpark, and is demanding a refund of everyone’s tickets. You have a no-refund policy. What would you say in response to his demands for a refund?

A: Acknowledge the customer and paint a better future: “It sounds like you and your family had a miserable time. Here are a couple of things we can do for you. First, if you ever come back to the ballpark again, I want you to know that our security team is here to help you if you ever run into a situation like this again—just stop by this office. Second, even though we have a no-refund policy, I would like to offer you a discount voucher, because it would be great to have you come back and enjoy another game with us.”

3. Someone insists on cutting ahead of a long line because she is in a rush. What could you say to her?

A: Use the transitional phrase “even though” to focus on solutions: “It looks like you’re in a rush. Even though we have to help these people first, we can probably get to you within the next ten minutes. Would that work for you?” (If the answer is “no,” explore other options: stating how late you are open, calling in an order, and so on.)

4. A young man was ordered to leave your store after shouting and cursing at your employees when he was refused a refund. Now his mother, who has only heard his side of the story, has come in demanding a formal apology. How might you first address her?

A: Validate the mother’s agenda and ask to hear her view of the situation: “No one wants to feel like their child was disrespected. How did he describe the situation to you?” If you later correct her version of events, do so empathetically: “Your son was probably very upset, and may not have even realized how he was reacting. We certainly want to be fair both to him and to our employees. If he can express his concerns in the future without resorting to shouting and foul language, we would be happy to welcome him back to our store again.

Chapter 7: Reframing Your Message

1. You are going to arrive much later than expected for a plumbing appointment. You know from experience that this customer gets upset about everything. What could you say to lessen the intensity of his reaction?

A: Use normalizing: “Sometimes we have unexpected delays with plumbing problems, so today we’re running a lot later than I would like. The good news is that I can still get to you today, if you wish. Would it work for you if I came around 4 p.m.?”

2. A season ticket holder of the professional football team you work for is being informed that his seats are being moved to a less-desirable section so more luxury boxes can be built at your stadium. How would you deliver this news?

A: Use relative value: “Despite the impact of the construction, we will be able to relocate you to a section that is within the same quadrant of the stadium, within four rows of your original seats.”

3. You are telling one of the patients at your clinic that she has been reported to a credit bureau for not paying her bill on time. How would you word this?

A: Use context framing: “This is a very common situation, and as long as we can work with you to get current on your balance, there shouldn’t be a long-term impact on your credit.”

4. A customer is extremely loud and abrasive as she describes a haircut she felt went badly at your salon. Your manager hears this and rushes over. How would you explain the situation to the manager?

A: Use neutral terms to describe the customer’s behavior, but do not minimize her concerns: “Sally was sharing her concerns with me about a haircut that she was extremely unhappy about.”

Chapter 8: Grounding an Angry Outburst

For all three of these scenarios, the approach is similar: (a) use the highest level of acknowledgment possible, (b) ask good assessment questions, and (c) shift the focus to problem solving.

1. You are a hospital administrator, and a mother is furious about her son’s treatment: the delays, the pain, the lack of communication. How should you respond?

A: “Being in a hospital is frightening enough. I certainly wouldn’t want my child to be in pain, and in the dark, in a situation like this, so I’m very glad you came to see me. First, let me ask: How is your son doing right now? Is he still in pain? Next, I would like to learn more about what happened here. I really appreciate your input. Now, what can we do to make things right for your son for the rest of his stay?”

2. One of your home-remodeling clients calls, enraged that your crew accidentally shattered a prized stained glass window at her house. This situation was totally your fault. How do you respond?

A: “I can’t even imagine how upset you must be about having such a beautiful window damaged. I remember it well, and it is one of the showpieces of your house. First, I want to sincerely apologize for such a terrible mishap. Now, could you describe the damage for me? How much of the window was affected? Are there any safety issues I should know about, like sharp edges of glass? . . . I want to stop by as soon as possible to see what we can do to make this right. When would be a good time for you?”

3. A woman is very angry about her lawn mower breaking down again. After you have asked a few questions, it is clear to you that she is misusing it on terrain it was never intended for. Nonetheless, she feels the problem is your fault. What do you say?

A: “I can see how frustrated you are—this is probably the fourth time you’ve had to bring this mower back for repairs! So let’s try to get to the bottom of this. Tell me about the area you are mowing. Is it flat? Are there any roots or branches under your path? What are the grass and the vegetation like? . . . I think I see where the problem might be. You are describing the kind of terrain that we normally use a heavy-duty mower for. Let me walk you through some options.”

Chapter 9: Becoming Immune to Intimidation

1. You run a small wholesale business, and a new customer is offering you a large contract, but he tells you your prices are ridiculous and insists on a 40 percent discount, similar to what he says everyone else would offer him. You still would like his business. What do you say in response?

A: Accept his self-importance: “It sounds like you do a good job of watching your costs. Let me go over what kinds of quantity discounts I can offer you on premium stock items like these.”

2. You explain to a customer that she will need to pay for a repair, and she replies tartly, “I don’t usually deal with people at your level anyway.” What is your reply?

A: Use fogging: “Sometimes people do want to speak to a manager about situations like these, and you are welcome to do so. I apologize that I can’t waive the repair fee.”

3. A diner expresses dissatisfaction with his meal and wants you to cancel the bill for his entire party of eight. He is threatening to contact a local food critic if you don’t. How do you respond to this?

A: Underreact to the threat: “I apologize that you weren’t happy with your meal, and I wouldn’t dream of telling you whom not to talk to. If it would help, I am prepared to offer you a discount on tonight’s bill.”

Chapter 10: The Wrap-Up

1. A customer angrily demanded a refund for a product after going on at great length about how horrible it was. She didn’t realize that you would be more than happy to give her a refund, and now she looks a little embarrassed about her behavior. What do you say?

A: Normalize the situation: “Situations like these frustrate a lot of people. In fact, I reacted very similarly when I was having constant problems with my food processor. I’m glad we could work this out.”

2. Someone calls your appliance service company and is extremely upset that no one showed up as scheduled the day before to make a repair. After rescheduling the appointment, what do you say before hanging up?

A: Provide a verbal receipt: “Let’s reconfirm what our plans are for tomorrow. We are going to make sure that someone arrives between noon and 2 p.m. at your house. In the event there are any delays, one of our staff will call you at your home number. And I want to encourage you to check in with me personally if there are any problems tomorrow. Finally, I want to apologize again for what happened yesterday, and we really appreciate your giving us a chance to make this situation right.”

3. A woman purchased several expensive pieces of equipment at your hardware store and was very picky and demanding about everything. You sense that she was getting exasperated with you as she kept pressing you with more questions. What might you say at the end of the transaction to help preserve her future business?

A: Reaffirm the customer relationship: “You’ve picked out some very good-quality pieces of equipment, and I’m glad we could help you. Please come back if we can help you with anything else in the future.”