27.

Puppies, Kitties, and Children

Do you remember the 2017 video of Dr. Robert Kelly, the British professor who, while being interviewed in his home office on South Korean politics for BBC World News, was interrupted on camera by his adorable two children and then his frantic wife who was trying to gather said children? It went viral, and everyone who was anyone saw it within a few weeks.

If you were someone who worked from home, it went a little more than viral, it went mildly cancerous. Friends, family, and co-workers alike sent dozens of links to the incident with remarks like, “OMG has this ever happened to you?” or “Something to think about!” We know this from experience, because we received a link to Dr. Kelly’s video more than fifty times in just two days. Our personal favorite comment was, “You don’t have any kids, but any one of your many cats could do this, so make sure to lock your door!”

Let’s Level Set, Shall We?

The video brought to light an issue that often plagues the minds of remote workers: What happens if my husband or wife, children or pets, parents or roommates just casually walk into frame while I’m conducting a meeting? Just as you might worry about your phone going off in a crowded theater, the concerns surrounding how working from home plays out in any number of situations are real.

As addressed earlier in the chapter about privacy, working remotely requires an extra layer of discretion and planning. However, in this chapter, we want to cover a topic is that fairly unique to the modern remote worker and manager: letting people into your world, into your home, and into your home office, as a daily part of your employment. Whether they’re heard over the phone or seen on video chat, parts of your private life are often on display, and that often includes anyone or anything that lives with you.

On one hand, you want to be mindful that a loved one, roommate, or pet could interrupt a meeting or call, but there is another side to the equation: When your co-workers want to see your new kitten or puppy. Or they want to say hello to your children who are home because of a holiday break or time-difference. Or they want to say a hello to your husband or wife because they are also at home.

What does one do? Build a set of policies related to the inclusion and exclusion of family members, pets, and interruptions.

Creating Policy From or For Potential Chaos

Life happens. No one knows this better than the aforementioned Dr. Kelly, who came to be known as “BBC Dad,” but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t anticipate life and try to prepare for it. In a modern, virtual word, we propose a few pointers, policies, and procedures related to the existence of what we like to call Virtphy’s Law—a virtual riff on the term Murphy’s Law, meaning anything that can go wrong in your virtual setting will go wrong.

Lock Your Doors

Lock your doors and remind those you manage to do the same. It’s that simple. Suggest hanging a dry erase board or posting a note on the door so folks on the other side know why the door is shut and locked, and why they shouldn’t knock, jiggle the handle, or yell through the door asking why it’s locked in the first place:

Any of these messages should be enough to make adults and most kids stay quiet and respectful around your closed, locked door. It’s also thoughtful and kind. If you’re not always home alone when working, letting those who live with you have a small level of insight to your day or how they should or shouldn’t conduct themselves while you’re working is just showing respect in both directions.

Don’t forget that a locked door is often truly just an invitation to knock. But a locked door with a smart note is golden.

Post a Calendar

While it’s possible to get sucked into a meeting or call at any moment, it’s safe to say that at least 50 percent of your day is probably pre-scheduled. And while your co-workers and direct reports often have access to your calendar—at least to see what’s blocked off—it doesn’t hurt to do the same for your household.

Creating a virtual shared calendar is easy, and modern technology allows you to merge your work calendar with another calendar that you can share anyone else. Or in a pinch, you could just post a handwritten or printed calendar on your door to share what your day looks like and when you need privacy. Just make sure to remind those you manage do not directly share their work calendar with a friend or loved one; most workplace email systems won’t allow third-party emails to do so, but in case they do, have a policy in place prohibiting employees from attempting this shortcut.

Light It Up

Here’s a more fun suggestion. Why just post a sign or share a calendar? Why not go fully modern and install a remote- controlled light outside your door—one that you turn on when you’re on a call or in a meeting (like those old recording booths). This is also a fantastic tool for young children; they may not be able to read, but they know that when the light is on mommy, daddy, or Uncle Ben is on a call and can’t look at the cool Lego kit they just built. (Not that we know from experience.) This might be a stretch to turn into a policy for those you manage, but no matter what style of notification and protection you take or recommend, it’s important that everyone knows to do more than just shut their door.

Maintaining a Culture of Homestead Humanity

Working remotely often means working from home. And that home includes a variety of things that can be seen and heard on a phone or camera. Everything from a plant to a piece of art to your walls are just as much on camera as you are. Add in the occasional family member, friend, or pet who walks on screen or makes a noise in the office, and you’ve opened yourself up to a world of questions or feedback from co-workers:

Some of this is no different from the proximity world, where a fun mug, photos of family, and personal choices of art are on display. But what often separates the proximity from virtual working world is that instead of commenting on a static photo of your dog, your co-workers have a chance to see Scruffy on-screen every day—they can see him age, play, eat … lick himself. You get the idea.

Let’s look at a few guidelines for homesteading your home office.

Be Mindful of What’s On Display

Depending on where you take your calls or video conferences, anything you own could be on display and it doesn’t hurt to take stock of what people will see on screen. This reflects what you don’t want them to see just as much as what you do want them to see.

In the same what that you would consider your cubical background while doing a Facebook Live video, it doesn’t hurt to take a curated approach your environment. Do you want to use the space to express yourself through your personal art, smart lighting, or maybe a view into your gorgeous backyard? Or, would you rather hide your surroundings? You may not want your co-workers to seen those piles of unread mail, your messy kitchen, a dying plant, or that clothing-covered treadmill.

Maintaining the corner of your world that co-workers or clients can see is just as important in the virtual workplace as in the proximity-based one. Maybe even more.

Make Space for Insight Into Virtual Life

Some work environments are casual, whether virtual or proximity- based. In these cases, people will frequently ask how your spouse, children, or pets are. In the virtual environment, people might call out to your spouse or child on a call or video conversation, knowing they are within ear’s reach, and expect to hear some kind of reply. Or maybe they’ll ask to see the new baby or what the kids are wearing for Halloween. They will ask where you got the wallpaper in the background or if you’re loving the new coffee maker they can see behind your shoulder.

Where this is the norm, allow it to be the norm. Create space for these conversations in the first or last few minutes of a call. Invite people “into” each other’s space where it applies. Recreating a kind of “show and tell” atmosphere to talk about what kind of coffee you’re drinking, the music you’re listening to, or the new art you have on the walls is a fantastic way to build morale, familiarity, and team building. Just make sure everyone is on board.

When Transparency’s Not Welcome, Build a Policy

While it’s normal to occasionally notice and mention something you can see or hear in the background of a co-worker’s home or office, culturally this isn’t always welcome and needs to be curtailed. In these cases, it’s important to develop some sort of guidance or policy explaining that you encourage employees at Company XYZ to refrain from commenting or expressing interest in another co-worker’s or client’s virtual surroundings. Remember—the proper way of discouraging something is to do so in writing.

A Few More Thoughts

Remember a quiet, uninterrupted virtual workplace is not inhuman. Working remotely or from home can lead to a number of potential interruptions, but that doesn’t mean they’re all invited or welcome to a productive workday.

Keep the noise down. You might need a written policy requesting people conduct their work away from noisy, interruptive, or distracting environments—even if those noises, interruptions, or distractions come from loved ones or pets. When those policies are repeatedly broken, they can be addressed appropriately as policies and not as personal attacks.

Don’t mistake what you see with what you should say. Just because you can see something in the background doesn’t mean it needs to be addressed or discussed. Just as someone’s new haircut doesn’t always need mention, the same goes for a new background, piece of art, or family member.

Signing Off

In a proximity-based or virtual scenario, life goes on around us when we’re working. Working virtually, especially when that means working from home, has many advantages, such as being able to spend more time with the ones you love. They are important to you and bring joy to your life. But it’s also essential to remember that work is important too, and it should continue as seamlessly and uninterrupted as possible, no matter where you’re working from. Being proactive in managing your environment and the environment of your employees will go a long way to successfully balancing work life and home life—no matter how many puppies, kitties, or children you have or co-workers want to see.