19 Beliefs

Beliefs—Your Value System

At an international distance race in Spain in late 2012, Kenyan runner Abel Mutai was in first place, followed by Spaniard Ivan Fernandez Anaya. For some reason—perhaps the way the course was marked—Mutai thought the end of the race was about 10 meters before the actual finish line, and he slowed to a stop. The Spanish crowd attempted to point out the error, but Mutai didn't understand the foreign language. Anaya could have overtaken Mutai and claimed first place but instead came up behind him. He guided Mutai to the finish line, preserving the outcome as if Mutai had not made his mistake. When asked why he didn't overtake Mutai, Anaya explained that he wasn't the rightful winner and if it weren't for Mutai's confusion, he would have not won. The conclusion Anaya made—to help his competitor—was heavily influenced by a belief about doing the right thing.

We all have values. Many are shared; some are different. Not everyone has a strong do-the-right-thing value; some people have an every-man-for-himself value. Some people believe that their job takes priority over their personal life, whereas others feel the opposite. Some think it's perfectly acceptable to take a few office supplies home for personal use, but others consider it stealing and would never do so. Being on time is extremely important to some people; others think it's perfectly okay to be late. Regardless of the stance, these are all beliefs.

Beliefs are your core values. They are not statements such as “I believe we should do this!” or “My belief is that the project should be cancelled.” These are conclusions or tasks to do, not beliefs. Using the word believe about something doesn't automatically make that thing a belief. Beliefs are not situational; they don't vary with circumstances. They are about you and your values.

Many people assume that critical thinking is a nonemotional, objective process. Although that would be nice, it's impossible—because we are human. We have values that we apply to everything we do. The conclusions you reach will be consistent with your values. The thousands of conclusions you make daily are influenced by your values—what you believe to be right or wrong, good or bad, proper or not.

Here are a few examples:

• You're walking down the sidewalk, and you notice a wallet on the grass. You pick it up. There's about $200 in it and no identification. Should you keep it or turn it over to the police? Your choice depends on what your values are.
• You purchase something in the store labeled $19.99. The cashier rings up $9.99. Do you correct the mistake? It depends on your values.
• You're finishing up a project, and you notice an error in a 100-page document that's otherwise ready to go to print. The typo would have little to no effect and probably would not be noticed. Do you delay and fix it? What do your values say?
• You're having dinner with your family at a nice restaurant, and your 18-month-old child is upset about something and crying. Do you stay at the table, making failed attempts to stop the crying? Do you excuse yourself and carry your child out of the restaurant? It depends on your values.

We call these values your beliefs. They consist of your constitutional merits and flaws, including your prejudices. They're the same at work or at home, whether you're with family, friends, or strangers. And they're virtually the same as an adult as they were when you were a kid.

You use your beliefs as a filter or gate, and you make conclusions that are consistent with your filter. Some people have values about being non-confrontational, whereas others consider confrontation just fine—even necessary. Two people might come to very different conclusions in the same circumstances; one person may speak up, whereas one remains quiet. Some place value on following rules, whereas others believe rules were made to be broken.

Although you might disagree with someone's beliefs (values), you can't tell someone his or her values are wrong. Values are core to an individual, so telling someone his or hers are wrong falls on deaf ears. You can respectfully disagree with someone's beliefs, but that's about it. Consider the topic of religion. You may have a religion or you may not. But if you have a particular belief and tell others theirs are wrong—how are they likely to react? A more acceptable approach would clearly be to acknowledge their beliefs and simply have a different view.

Let's first take a look at where beliefs come from, the beliefs of the people you associate with, and then examine the important question about how to reconcile a disagreement if beliefs are different.

Beliefs are generally formed when you are very young and are heavily influenced by your environment. Let's say you and your family ate dinner together when you were a child, and your parents often talked about people who dyed their hair different colors—how unusual that was and how those people were irresponsible and poor workers. You grow up with a prejudice toward people who dye their hair different colors, despite your never having met a person with hair dyed different colors. Now you're all grown up, your manager comes to introduce you to your new work peer, and she has hair dyed a bright fluorescent green and blue. You freak out and say to your manager, “Oh my, we are in so much trouble. This person is going to be irresponsible and a bad worker.”

Your manager says, “Why do you say that? She has an impeccable history of accomplishments.”

“She has green and blue hair. People who dye their hair colors are bad workers,” you say.

“Nonsense,” your manager says, but you'll discount what your manager says, because your prejudice is part of who you are. You begrudgingly work with this person, and, to your surprise, she's okay. However, you're still not convinced.

The next person comes in, and he has bright yellow and red hair. “Oh, no, not again,” you think. Your manager tells you everything will be all right. You work with this person, and he too is okay—actually, a very effective employee. Therefore, over time—possibly a long time—you'll be fine with people who have different colored hair. Your beliefs change based on experiences contrary to your values, but it takes awhile for this to happen. Your beliefs don't change because someone says, “You're nuts,” “That's not right,” or “Don't believe that.”

There are 7 billion people in the world, but there aren't 7 billion values. It is no coincidence that you share beliefs with your friends and have a common set with your work associates. You would not befriend someone with different values. People who have values different from the office culture are generally unsuccessful in a given work environment. For example, say you work in the health care industry as a home health aide. More than likely, you have beliefs related to helping others, as do your peers. Now a new employee enters and says, “You know, people who are sick need to help themselves and not rely on healthy people.” How long do you think that person would keep this job? Either the employee would be fired, or he or she would quit because he or she would be miserable working with that attitude. Most of the people you work with share values because if they didn't, they wouldn't fit in and would subsequently leave.

When Beliefs Are Different

Although the people we associate with usually have shared values, we do have some different values—and it's hard to change someone's beliefs, no matter how wrong you perceive them to be. How do you deal with people who disagree about a conclusion when their beliefs differ from yours? It's an important question although a less common issue in the business world than you think. Not only do we work with people who share many of our values, but also the weight you put on your values at work will typically be less than on highly personal issues. Beliefs have less influence on your professional conclusions than on your personal ones.

People usually disagree in a business setting about something because of varied facts, observations, and experiences. Nevertheless, there will be those times when a belief is where the disagreement mainly resides and obstructs a conclusion. For instance, you're collaborating with a peer who believes in doing things right the first time. You're working on a computer software project that you need to finish up. A passionate discussion ensues. You say, “Okay, our solution won't last forever, but I think we're good to go.”

Someone else chimes in, “No, we're not ready. If we finish now, we'll just have to do it again someday. We need to do it right this time.”

There is no right or wrong here; your values are simply different. Things escalate to your manager, who sides with finishing up now, and if there's something to redo down the road, so be it. If he or she thinks critically, your manager would say to your coworker, “I know you are all about doing it right the first time and there's merit to that. However, there is great benefit in this particular instance in getting this out the door now. I acknowledge that we might have to redo some things down the road, and if we delayed now we might avoid that; but I'm okay with having that exposure. So can you be okay this time?” It's a mouthful, but when you acknowledge some-one's belief, you help him or her align with another conclusion. Of course, if you had that conversation every day, that person would probably quit at some point.

What happens if a person digs his or her heels in so deeply about a belief that he or she is immovable? This instance rarely occurs in business, but it can. This individual puts so much weight on a belief that he or she might discount or ignore facts, observations—even personal experiences. The matter becomes irreconcilable—and there is a big difference here between critical and automatic thinking. Irreconcilable differences in critical thinking are based solely on different fundamental values and are uncommon. But the differences we think are irreconcilable in automatic thinking are actually reconcilable, because they are based on dissimilar facts, observations, and experiences. What most likely could have been resolved is not, and misunderstanding and bad decisions from filled buckets are the result.

Belief-only disagreements are generally more prevalent in personal relationship and geopolitical worlds. It can be an interesting exercise to have a conversation with someone from an opposing political view about the economy, the government, or foreign policy. Beliefs will surface fast; you'll disagree and then see how challenging it is to reconcile those disagreements. One question remains, however: Can you resolve a disagreement that is based solely on an immovable, unwavering, uncompromising, do-or-die belief? This is when words such as irrational come into play—and then there is no reconciliation. In business, the boss will make the call, and if some people are simply unable to digest the conclusion, then they quit. Unfortunately, the only way humans have found to reconcile these fundamentally opposing ideological beliefs in the geopolitical world is often through violence or war. Critical thinking can prevent most of this, because it will bring to the surface disagreements based on facts, observations, and experiences; however, it doesn't always work.

So far, we have covered facts, observations, experiences, and beliefs. There's one more component of our premise to cover: assumptions. Once we describe assumptions, we'll put all the premise components together, and you'll see how everything works.