Look, you may not like the answers but if you ask questions then at least you’ll know. Most of the world’s problems can be laid firmly at the feet of assumptions. If we assume (no, I’m not going to do that dreadful ‘It makes an ass out of u and me’ stuff^*) then, in effect, we think we know but we don’t. We assume that our bit of faulty information is a fact and things go on getting worse. We assume that other people like our plan but they don’t and it all goes pear-shaped. Better to ask questions right from the start and know what’s what.

Questions help clarify the situation. Questions put people on the spot, which means they have to think – and thinking is always a good thing for everybody about everything. Questions help people clarify their thoughts. Questions demand answers and answers require the situation to be thought through, to its logical conclusion.

As someone very wise and very dear to me once said: ‘The better you understand the beliefs, actions, desires and wants of others, the more likely you are to make the right response, alter your own thinking where necessary and generally be successful’.

Asking questions gives you time to think, buys you breathing space. Rather than flying off the handle because you think you know the situation, it’s better to ask a few questions and find out the truth. You’ll be better equipped to respond logically, calmly and correctly.

You can always tell the real Rules Players; they’re the ones asking questions while others are reacting, panicking, misinterpreting, assuming, losing control and generally behaving badly.

Ask questions of yourself constantly. Ask why you think you’re right – or wrong. Ask yourself why you are doing certain things, want other things, follow a particular course of action. Question yourself firmly and rigorously because maybe there isn’t anyone else doing it. And you need it. We all do. It keeps us from assuming we know what’s best for ourselves.

And of course there is a time to stop asking questions; of others and of ourselves. You have to know when to back off. All this takes a long time to learn and we all make mistakes as we go. Any questions?