One of the best things about a bad day at work – or school or college or anywhere else – is being able to go home at the end of the day and shut the door on it. Block out the horrid world and hide away in your own sanctuary until you’re ready to pop your head out again.

So what happens when things aren’t going well at home? Obviously you need to escape into work – or school or college or whatever – and lie low there until it feels safe to go back inside. There’s nothing wrong with running away, you know. Of course some kinds of running away aren’t a good idea, but on a temporary, small scale it’s very underrated, and often it solves the problem. All it needed was a bit of time or space. When you get home the family is less grumpy or the heating’s been fixed or just taking the time out has given you a shift in perspective.

Longer-term and more serious problems are helped by having somewhere else to go too. If your boss constantly belittles you, at least you can feel confident at home. If one of your family is ill and a constant worry, at least when you’re at work you can feel in control.

This gives us the next Rule. It’s important to move in more than one world, so that you have the best chance of retaining some part of your life that makes you happy even when other parts are going through a phase that is worrying, draining, upsetting, confidence-sapping, frustrating. Don’t be immersed all the time in work, or in kids, or in college or anything else. Make sure you have places you can escape to when you need it: family, work, friends, hobbies.

A life of variety is a lifeline in bad times, but it’s also the most interesting and fulfilling kind of life. You can choose your own balance – obviously you can choose what you like, it’s your life – so that you get all the good bits. It’s not just about having an escape. Different circles bring you different ingredients for happiness. You might get all the love and confidence you need from staying at home with the kids (or you might not – I don’t know), but it may not help you feel respected, for example. Another part of your life might supply mental stimulation, and another excitement, or relaxation. Sometimes you can get a lot of what you need from one area of life, but to get everything you need to make you happy, along with an escape when things go badly, you really need to mix it up a bit.