Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) is different from traditional “talk” therapy. It is based on delving into your current thought processes rather than your past experiences. It requires your active participation in the process of getting better. You complete homework assignments to practice skills and techniques. When you work with a therapist, it is a collaborative effort, working together to set goals and prioritize issues.
CBT has been shown to be effective in treating a range of issues, including depression and anxiety. The methods described in this book help you look at your thoughts, not just as thoughts, but also as precursors to your emotions and behaviors. Once you understand your thought process, you have the choice to change it. You have the opportunity to look at situations, and life, differently. You have the choice to think in a more positive, healthy, and helpful way. CBT teaches you how.
You don’t have to be “mentally ill” or have a disorder to benefit from CBT. The strategies used in CBT improve your life in many ways. They help you increase your self-esteem, overcome anger issues, and improve your relationships. You learn how to change your inner dialogue and get rid of old, outdated, negative views of yourself. You let go of perfectionist ideals and deal with the uncertainty of life. CBT teaches you how to be assertive and manage the inevitable stress in your life.
This book provides self-help exercises to get you on the road to feeling better. If you do choose to work with a therapist, this book is still helpful when used as a workbook. Together, you and your therapist go through sections that address your specific concerns. The exercises are easily used as homework assignments.
CBT is a skill-based therapy. You learn techniques for analyzing your thoughts and creating new beliefs and how to change your feelings and emotions by identifying the thoughts behind them. You learn how mindfulness, visualization, and relaxation fit into your overall feelings of well-being. As with all new skills, CBT takes practice and commitment. Once you learn these skills, you gain a healthier perspective of yourself, your life, and the world around you.
How This Book Is Organized
This book is designed as a self-help book. It gives explanations of CBT concepts and provides exercises to help you put those concepts into action. We understand you are not a medical professional and don’t want to read a book full of medical jargon. For this reason, we tried to keep the focus of this book free of too much CBT terminology. When we introduce these words, we provide you with a general explanation of the term. There is a glossary at the end of the book should you need to look up any terms used in CBT.
To make this book easier to use, we have included many of the forms you need to complete the exercises in Appendix C. Some of these forms are used more than once. Make copies of the forms to give you enough to complete the exercises.
Part 1, Understanding CBT, covers the basics of CBT. It explains the theory behind CBT and the basic concepts you need to know to interpret your thoughts and feelings. It discusses the most common problematic thinking patterns and teaches you how to identify your thinking processes. We explain the difference between helpful and unhelpful emotions and how your thoughts relate to these emotions. Finally, we help you set goals for your getting better.
Part 2, CBT Techniques, covers the basic skills you will use throughout this book. You learn how to use the images in your mind to change your thoughts by changing the pictures. Making changes to your thinking can be scary, so we teach you different relaxation and meditation techniques to incorporate in your exercises. We explain another helpful technique, mindfulness, and give you exercises to help you learn how to be present in the moment. You learn how to talk to yourself in a positive way. Finally, you learn techniques for testing the strong beliefs you hold about yourself.
Part 3, CBT for Personal Growth, provides information and exercises for using CBT in your everyday life. We provide exercises to build self-acceptance and give you steps to improve your self-image. We discuss how perfectionism often leads to disappointment in life and give you specific ways you can create a more balanced view of yourself and your behavior. We focus on helping you improve your relationship by changing the way you think and communicate with your significant other. You learn how to stand up for yourself and deal with the daily stress of life.
Part 4, CBT for Specific Conditions and Situations, focuses on problems that often interfere with your ability to enjoy life. You complete thought analysis to identify patterns leading to depression and change your thoughts to feel better. CBT is also effective in treating anxiety and we give you a step-by-step approach to facing your fears and calming your worries. You learn techniques to tame your temper. We provide ways to say no to your addiction and deal with cravings. We also discuss obsessive-compulsive disorder and teach you how to see thoughts as simply thoughts, not premonitions of danger. Finally, we help you change how you feel about your body, giving you exercises to improve your body image.
Part 5, Moving Forward, discusses strategies for making CBT work, even after you completed the book. It examines common reasons CBT doesn’t work and provides suggestions for overcoming them. We guide you in setting up a self-therapy session to maintain your new skills. Finally, we discuss finding and working with a therapist and what to expect during a typical CBT therapy session.
Pay attention to the sidebars throughout the book. They provide information and advice to help you make the most of your CBT.
DEFINITION
Here you’ll find the definitions of some commonly used terms in CBT.
CBTIDBIT
Look to these sidebars for tips about using CBT in your life.
STOP AND THINK
Consider these words of advice before implementing CBT techniques.
IMAGINE THAT
These sidebars provide interesting statistics and general information about CBT.
GIVE IT A TRY
Start thinking and acting differently with these suggested CBT exercises.
Acknowledgments
From Dr. Jayme Albin: I would like to acknowledge Eileen Bailey, my co-author, for all her hard work. I would also like to thank my clients from over the years, all of who have helped me grow personally and professionally.
From Eileen Bailey: This book would not have been possible without the help and support of my children, Evelyn and Soloman, who were forever understanding of the extra time I spent writing during this project. I would like to thank my “Fun and Fabulous 50 pluses” who are a constant inspiration of what women can accomplish; they listened when I needed to talk things through and were my cheerleaders when I needed encouragement. Thank you to my neighbor and friend, Sandie, for our weekly tea-time, during which I could view the information and exercises in the book through the eyes of a reader. To the numerous psychologists I spoke with when writing this book, your insights into the workings of CBT were invaluable. Many thanks to my co-author, Jayme, who shared her wealth of knowledge and expertise on cognitive behavioral therapy. As always, I would like to thank my agent, Marilyn Allen, and editor, Brook Farling, for the many hours they have spent bringing this book from concept to reality.
Trademarks
All terms mentioned in this book that are known to be or are suspected of being trademarks or service marks have been appropriately capitalized. Alpha Books and Penguin Group (USA) Inc. cannot attest to the accuracy of this information. Use of a term in this book should not be regarded as affecting the validity of any trademark or service mark.
Disclaimer
This book is meant as a self-help tool. It provides information and exercises to help you make improvements in your life. We discuss a number of medical conditions. This book is not meant to replace medical care.