If your goal is to accelerate people's growth, it is critical to optimize fit. We touched on this idea in the previous chapters. Aligning expectations to people's talents and themes creates optimal fit, and optimal fit increases the power of any investment you make in people's growth. This is so important to accelerating people's growth that we are unpacking it a little further in this chapter. Here is a story to get us started:

Scorpion can't swim. And he can't not sting. Is there another way to get him across the river? Is there a way to get him across the river that aligns with something he can do or will do or can't not do to achieve the goal?

As a manager, do your expectations of others match their themes? Are you asking people for behaviors they do not have in their repertoires? What will happen if you change your expectations so that they align with people's themes?

You get these clashes of themes sometimes, and in some cases knowing the root cause of that disharmony enables both people to manage through the situation in a more constructive way. But sometimes both people are scorpions. They just cannot help stinging each other.

You might be thinking, “Sometimes in business, people have to change or they will fail in their job.” That might be true, but it does not give the person the capacity to make the required change. In fact, when you get into that kind of a situation, you probably start the kind of cycle Bill initially did with his daughter's messy room. You do not accept people as they are, you keep trying to get them to change, but they do not change. In a professional situation, you begin progressive discipline, the relationship deteriorates, and eventually the person gets fired or quits. The likely truth is that, in situations like this, the person was in the wrong job at the outset. You had the wrong expectations for him or her.

We are aware that it is extremely difficult for some people to quit trying to fix others. In fact, many people will vehemently disagree with our point of view. So we ask only this. Remember that you are in a laboratory. If you believe you can fix people, pursue that strategy with conviction. Measure the outcomes of your efforts. Be aware and be honest with yourself about the results you are getting.