Offsite team-building events are expensive, often involving costs for travel, meals, lodging, and professional facilitators. The biggest cost is the salaries of the participants. As a manager, you must ensure that these events create enough value to justify the investment of time, effort, and money.

First, be clear about the goals and outcomes you want from an offsite team-building event. It is not unusual for a leader to say something like, “Larry, I need some team building. Can you facilitate a half-day for me?”

“Team building” means different things to different people. So I ask some questions.

1. Why do you need a team-building event?
2. What do you hope to accomplish?
3. When it is over, if we are wildly successful, what will be different in the workplace?

Once you have clarified what you want to accomplish and why, you can move on to the most important step in this process: selecting the right facilitator. Your success will depend less on the agenda and more on the facilitator. Whether or not you accomplish your goals depends entirely on the talent of the facilitator. Because each team is unique, each of these events takes on a life of its own. A talented facilitator is attuned to the group and can sense when to detour from the planned agenda. A great facilitator can recognize an important moment, and knows how to capitalize on it. The most valuable team-building events often take major detours from the planned agenda.

Be realistic about what can be accomplished in this type of event. You are not going to magically change your team culture. At best, you might achieve a breakthrough upon which you can build. Near the conclusion of the event, call for commitments about what each person will do differently when they return to the workplace.

Keep in mind that you can achieve meaningful team building without a facilitator or an expensive retreat. There are plenty of low-cost team-building possibilities available to every group. Find some community volunteer activities your team can do together. Celebrate important life events together. Create a team book club. Create a team discussion night in which you informally brainstorm and discuss ideas and possible strategies for improvement—no flip charts, no minutes, no follow up—just discussion of ideas. Do a joke night after work. Cook together—there is something ancient and powerful about cooking and sharing a meal. The possibilities are endless.

Remember, team-building events can add a lot of value, but team building should occur every day. This is your responsibility. Ensure the team is aligned around clear goals and values. Hold people accountable to enliven those values and to fulfill their responsibilities. Make sure each person understands and appreciates the strengths of his or her teammates. Encourage people to ask each other for help. Set the standard for caring deeply and authentically for each person on your team.

When a team is aligned around its goals and values, when people appreciate one another's strengths, and when people care deeply and authentically about one another, amazing things can happen.