When everyone is happy and pulling together, we all benefit. You want to get the best out of people, for their benefit and yours, and you also want to be able to help and support them as well as possible. The two go hand in hand really. So to get the best, you have to know what makes them tick.
You wouldn’t expect to be able to fix your car when it breaks down without knowing what goes on under the bonnet. It might have been something really simple, but without a grasp of basic mechanics you can’t fix it, can’t expect it to get you home. A simple understanding about how the internal combustion engine works, though, and you’ve a decent chance of making it to your destination.
Just so, even a rudimentary knowledge of what makes people work will mean you can get what you need from them, and help them along the way too. This first group of Rules sets out principles of human behaviour which will be useful in dealing with other people. These are the underlying factors which cause people to behave as they do, and which can give you clues to persuading them to behave differently where their current style works against either you or them, or both.
I’ve included a few Rules at the end of this section about helping your own child once they become a teenager, because I’ve found a lot of parents feel they flounder at this stage. They can see their almost-adult offspring need support but don’t feel confident about how to give it. Mind you, all the Rules apply to teenagers you know who aren’t your own child, and a lot of them are echoed in other relationships too.
There’s nothing tricky or scientific here – I’m not clever enough for that. These are just basic observations, many of which you will recognise once you think about them.