92 brilliant stress management
Now you are stuck with them – rather like the way you are stuck
with your ght-or-ight response, even though it was designed for
an ancient environment. The difference is: you can change your
values, because they are not part of you. Rather, most of us got
them from our parents, our society, our schooling and our religion.
The iceberg model
A compelling way to think of your values, and why they are so
important, is to picture yourself as an iceberg. What people see
of you is the part that is above the water: your behaviour and the
effect you have on the world, as a result. Below the water line are
aspects of you that nobody can see: your capabilities, the beliefs
you have about yourself and the world, and the values that drive
you. Deepest of all is your sense of who you are.
© MikeClayton,2011
Behaviour
Capabilities
Beliefs
Values
Identity
Figure 5.1 The iceberg model
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