Help others to manage their stress 199
3 Do nothing to endorse another player’s perceptions of
themself or of other players.
4 Remain courteous and calm at all times, and pause so you
can analyse the perceptions before making a response. Use
the SCOPE process.
5 Break the cycle by declaring what is happening. Encourage
other players to analyse the drama.
6 Step out of the play. If all else fails, walk away.
7 Refuse to feel bad about how the other player perceives
you. Be confident of your own motivations and accept that,
if you did not play the situation as you would have wished,
then at least you tried in good faith.
Expert help
Pointing someone towards the right professional or expert help
is the ultimate way you can help them. Often a GP is a good rst
port of call, and an appointment will never be the wrong thing for
someone whose health is in danger. GPs can help access the full
range of social or medical care resources available locally. They
will be able to weigh up a full range of options from counselling
to therapy to medical help and treatment with prescription drugs.
Here are a few further sources of help you might refer to.
brilliant
resources
Sources of professional help
If you have alcohol-related problems, Alcoholics Anonymous is a good
source of help: www.alcoholics-anonymous.org.uk
British Association for Counselling & Psychotherapy (BACP):
www.bacp.co.uk
200 brilliant stress management
brilliant
recap
There are four levels of listening and we help best when we
commit to the deepest level: empathising.
Good listening is a learnable skill, so turn off your inner voice,
refrain from criticising, and give me your full attention.
Use Albert Ellis’s ABCDE process to help restore a sense of
control.
Don’t encourage or allow yourself to get caught up in the
blame game. It is futile and destructive.
For practical help with legal, financial or other problems, the Citizens’
Advice Bureau, CAB: www.citizensadvice.org.uk
Gamblers Anonymous: www.gamblersanonymous.org.uk
International Stress Management Association (ISMA): www.isma.org.uk
For advice relating to mental health, Mind: www.mind.org.uk
For stress with relationships, Relate: www.relate.org.uk
For someone to listen, The Samaritans: www.samaritans.org
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